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anyone fancy going grey next year?

430 replies

notactuallyme · 20/12/2012 18:55

so, i've been toying with this idea for ages (am nearly forty) but always end up dying it. i thnk i'm going to go for it - anyone want a support thread for intermittent updates?

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LazyMachine · 14/03/2013 10:10

I must admit to more (and more) wobbling. Perhaps it is the 5 week old currently snoring away on my lap? I just feel like I look so drab. And 'mumsy' in the worst way possible.

I'm 100% natural now, all the dye is gone and the biggest issue is that I'm growing it into a longer style at the moment. The silvery grey looked great when it was all super short and funky (& pregnant because I was obviously young enough to be reproducing!!) I think it will look beautiful when it has grown long as my hair is naturally wavy and looks properly done when air-dried, but it's this horrible, ugly, completely boring growing-out phase that is painful. And makes me feel really unattractive and OLD. I'm only 39, not 69, ffs!

Am visiting my lovely and stylish hairdresser this afternoon in hope that she can help me stay grey. But this is a yucky phase, made depressingly worse by lack of sleep and post-pregnancy weight. Sad

LazyMachine · 14/03/2013 10:13

Sorry that super long post was all me me me. It's great to see
That everyone is holding out through the tough phases! Very inspiring.

notactuallyme · 14/03/2013 10:18

Aw lazy - it can feel really bad - i had to go straight to a hairdresser and demand they made me look better!
For me, the relief of not using hairdye/hairdresser every six weeks is immense, and I also feel less frumpy than when i had the odd creeping grey which indicated i needed to dye it.
I think its because everyone dyes their hair until they are late sixties, that we all feel 'old' by going grey any earlier. Could you compromise with a few highlights at the front? (Think that was allowed when we drew up The Rules)

OP posts:
auntpetunia · 14/03/2013 11:12

You keep changing The Rules Notactually!

sweetfluffybunnies · 14/03/2013 11:33

Hi all, just come across this thread and it's so interesting. I am 47 and for the last 4-5 years I have had my hair coloured (the hairdresser calls it natural glossing) to cover the few but increasing grey strands.

However over the last couple of weeks, whenever i look in the mirror, my face looks washed out and pale. I was wondering if this might be due to my hair colour now being too dark for my skin tone. Do you think this might be the case? I am due for a re-colour this Saturday but am thinking i might cancel and start to embrace my natural silver! I guess I can always get it coloured again if I don't like it, but as someone said above, I'm going to have to face it at some time, and of course grey hair can look fantastic.

auntpetunia · 14/03/2013 12:05

I think you've hit the nail on the head sweet, we've all really old ladies with huts of jet black hair and white faces! Maybe speak to your stylist and go for highlights nearer the grey or just cancel and go cold Turkey on the dye like we are. I promise we'll hold your hand if you waiver.

sweetfluffybunnies · 14/03/2013 12:48

Thanks aunt I think I will cancel and see how it goes. Both my dad and my grandmother had lovely pure white hair when they were older - hopefully mine will go like that eventually!

(And think of the money I'll save too!)

notactuallyme · 15/03/2013 23:44

aunt are highlights not allowed? I do remember me and the farside getting a bit carried away and strident a while back...maybe we should relent and allow a t-section?
sweet - you are totally right, you can always dye it back. Growing it out takes forever! I do think a block of darker hair isn't ageing so much as unflattering. Try embracing grey for a while?

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auntpetunia · 15/03/2013 23:50

Right if highlights are allowed I may get some !....probably won't actually am liking my badger look. Was wondering about these dye strippers you can get and whether that would be a way to make all my hair the same instead of brown /caramel and brown(v nearly black )with silver! Anyone tried them?

TheFarSide · 16/03/2013 19:19

Highlights are good for softening the contrast between grey hair and dyed hair (if your dyed hair is very dark) ... but then they do also have to be grown out.

I am discovering that not all my real hair is white - there seems to be quite a lot of darker grey round the back. I was hoping for a very striking all-white look, but it seems that is not to be. Still, it's an interesting experience waiting to see what's been hidden under the dye all these years.

Fluffy - one of the good things about having lighter hair is that my skin looks better than it has in years.

naturelover · 18/03/2013 13:11

Help please! Hand-holding needed.

As my semi-perm colours grows out it is looking really brassy and unflattering to my skin tone. I have quite yellow-toned skin and my natural colour is mousey. So anything warm/orangey looks terrible.

In addition, I am realising that most of my grey is on the temples, and the rest of my hair is dotted with grey. A close friend told me yesterday that she thinks the grey stripes at the temple are more ageing than grey dotted through the hair.

Today I learn about a school reunion and I really want to look good in 3 months' time for that.

Is there some way to tone down the brassy semi-perm colour while the rest grows out? Temple stripes aside, I think my natural colour with some grey is going to be more flattering to my skin tone than this orangey colour.

Thanks

auntpetunia · 18/03/2013 13:40

Hands held here! Now I'm not an expert but from what I've read on these boards you need the "purple shampoo "apparently it's great for toning down the brassiness. Haven't used it my hair is too dark but heard good things from friends with blonde hair.

naturelover · 18/03/2013 14:31

Purple shampoo? Yikes! But I'll look into it, thanks for the tip.

FannyFifer · 18/03/2013 14:40

I am in my mid 30's and decided to let my hair dye grow out in Jan, but I just can't do it anymore & have bought dye today.

TruthSweet · 18/03/2013 14:46

May I join in? I'm 33 & have no dye left after having it all chopped off last week to shoulder length. It's gone from straightish to wavy to Smile

My hair is now dark chestnut (mid brown with red undertones & the occasional black hair) with white strands through out - about 90% brown at a guess.

Can I use the purple shampoo or is it best to wait until I have more white?

auntpetunia · 18/03/2013 15:08

Right to the best of my knowledge the shampoo is not purple but it's in home bargain and boots called purple shampoo!

Fanyfifer don't do it...don't dye it, you've done so well, you'll have to go through the growing out phase all over again. Can you bear that. Can you get it cut to give you a lift, that's my plan (when I can sit in a hairdresser's backwash).

HilaryM · 18/03/2013 15:30

Oh I like this thread. Am 36 and have v few white hairs (5-10%) so have never dyed it, and I always wanted to go grey naturally. I will be salt and pepper I think, but that's ok.

FannyFifer · 18/03/2013 15:36

I have very dark hair with prob 30% grey, it looks really awful, white wiry bits that won't stay straight is not a good look.
It's just seriously making me look like I can't be bothered making an effort anymore.

Badvoc · 18/03/2013 15:41

Ooh...I am trying to decide too.
Have been quite ill recently and last week I was starting to look a bit judi dench :)
My natural colour was very dark brown. Got my first grey hairs at 17 and have been dyeing it since.
Am so tempted but am only 40.
That's too young isn't it?
And I would have that whole alistair darling thing going on as I have black eyebrows and eyelashes....

notactuallyme · 18/03/2013 16:39

Hey badvoc - i am 40 in July, I am much happier with about half grey, than when I had greying bits peeking out every six weeks. Try? Then you can always dye it back?

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Badvoc · 18/03/2013 17:43

Oohhhh...I don't know!
My mil actually said she liked it last week!
Thing is I am very grey...it would be mostly grey with a hint of brown.
Although I am quite pale...
I have a wedding to go to in july and I won't go grey before then!
Might do after though....

naturelover · 18/03/2013 17:58

Before I give in and resort to highlights I'm going to try one of those purple shampoos to try and remove the brassiness from the coloured bits.

Am also considering Colour B4 - anyone tried this?

Badvoc · 18/03/2013 18:01

Purple shampoo?
What's that for!?

TheFarSide · 18/03/2013 18:50

To those struggling with making a decision, I think it does depend on age and amount of grey. I'm 50 now, which doesn't feel too old to be grey, but I would have struggled with the idea at under 40. As for amount of grey, if you only have a few grey hairs then dyeing is not such a big deal ... but for me, now more than 90% grey, the regrowth was very obvious.

WildThong · 18/03/2013 18:59

Is this the purple shampoo