If I show you a photo, will you tell me what I would suit? A challenge and a half!

[sillymillyb]

Right - I feel awful. Im on my own with 7mo DS so feel post pregnancy blubbery, with no OH to reassure me that they still love me even though I look different now. I have a double chin and am spotty and just generally, feel like shite.

BUT!!!! Enough is enough! So, I have some questions.

I have put a photo of me on my profile.... and am booked into the hairdressers in the morning. What would you recommend? A bob? A colour change? Giving up and getting a wig?!

I am usually blonde but had a fit of stupidity and dyed my hair brown (see pics....) I just don't feel like me, and a couple of people have commented on me "being a blonde" So I think I need to address the colour thing.

I am post baby fat and don't see this changing as Im too knackered and lazy I am a size 14ish, 5ft 2, 34F boobs, blubbery tummy and arms.

I have a very catalogue account and am poor, so can only spend about £400 max and only from there.. What should I buy? I really need to start from scratch.

My days are spent on the floor with DS, and doing the school run for my nephews. They goto vaiiir posh schools, and I feel like the hired help most days. I'd like to fit in, and look classical and pulled together.

Please help. I feel like crap and have lost my confidence, so need some guidance.

Thank you

I like that scarf you're wearing in your blond shot actually! Just sort of musing aloud, but I'm like you in that I spend most of my time at home with DS2, and on the school run for DS1. So jeans and long sleeved tees are like my uniform! I feel good about myself when I go out to school or into town if I have a nice coat/jacket on, a big funky scarf or snood, and either boots or ballet shoes. I've had quite a few jackets from ebay, in fact I just bought a navy trench for £12! I might be slightly addicted to coats

And like other people are saying, £400 will turn into a much more expensive shop at Very over time... Maybe you should buy one or two bigger things, i.e. new coat and jeans or boots, and add more as you go, bearing in mind as well that you will lose weight and need to buy smaller stuff.

Also, a very gentle touch with an eyebrow palette will bring your eyebrows back in line with your hair. Go easy though.

I'm suggesting make up because you have a very pretty face, and I feel this will be an easy and instant boost for you

Could you try a Next account instead?, I find Very, very overpriced for what it is and there are much nicer things in Next.

Blubbery????????? You're mad, you just look pretty, and normal. Try to look at yourself how other people might see you, not as a collection of flaws.

I hadn't thought of changing make up! That's so daft of me! Will go look at those options now - thank you colditz

I have bought the shred - I was meant to be on the 100 days princessing thing but DS went through a none sleeping phase that totally brought me to my knees (thank you for your comments about him by the way, I know Im biased but he is bloody lovely!) I will open the packet and attempt it tomorrow

deffo go for a choppy fringe into layered bob.

iF you can afford the upkeep of a few caramel lights go for it. or perhaps a mixture of lighter shades?

you're lovely. baby is scrumptious too!!

That MUA stuff is in Superdrug - amazing, £1 for an eyeshadow! Not tried anything else though. Sorry, hijack!

Ok, exciting! I would put you in a shirt tucked into jeans with a low spiky heel. And a bb cream (maybelline) with a sweep of pale green eyeshadow. Side parting, maybe quiffing the top - not a fringe (maintenance) and not highlights (maintenance).

You are gorgeous. Don't change a thing. Xx

yes i like that sideparting ponytail quiff look too.

You really are all lovely, thank you so much for your help. I think I have lost sight of myself a little bit - in my old job it was very looks centred, and I know I am no where near good enough to go back to work. Its made me a bit ashamed to see people I think :S

Brows: I was hoping to get the HD brows thing done when I had some pennies - my friend has just had it done and she looks amazing so I thought it might give me a boost.

Clothes wise: I think you are right, a coat and some accessories would be a good start. I own a gazillion primark vests. I need some bottoms to go with this though as I honestly don't own any that fit properly. My tummy keeps making a bid for freedom over the top of them. T'is not very attractive!

What shoes would you all recommend?

I will look at next account too - I'm just worried about the temptation to spend if I have too many options! I do agree very prob shouldn't have been my first choice but I wanted to pick somewhere with lots of different brands so I could try different fits etc.

it's so easy to lose sight of yourself. It's like going into some sort of other universe and then slowly coming out the other side and thinking. 'hey hang on, where am I, who was i, what did i like and what will suit me now'

prob much the same as before, but you have to get the confidence. i look back of pics of me 1-3 yrs after dd was born and i look older then than i do now, yes i was more overweight but i just wanted to cover up the lumps and bumps.

My dd is now ten and i am more me now than ever!

saggy that made me blub! God I don't know whats the matter with me at the minute!

Is there a photo I could see of side parting / quiff look? How the hell would I achieve it? As you can see, I sort of just let my hair hang there at the mo!

notactuallyme Would a tucked in shirt work with giant norks?

Actually, on the giant nork front - how do I wear scarfs? The one in the picture is the only one I can get to vaguely work, the rest I feel just sit on top of my boobs making them look bigger. Is there a secret I don't know about?

I know I keep saying it, but thank you - I'm really touched by your comments and help x

pirate that's exactly it! I think I really have felt like I've been in another universe, and now I don't really know where I fit or what my role is. I'd feel stupid and fall over lots if I wore my old outfits, and I don't have the time to put myself together the way I used to.

Do you all remember the OP who was trying to plan her beauty regime for when her baby was here and it was something like 2 hours long? I often think of her when I haven't managed to shower for 3 days. I was pregnant at same time as her! Sorry, that's a tangent!

Hello I am absolutely useless at s&b but just wanted to say you look lovely and your baby is utterly scrumptious!!

Good luck with your mission, but you look a hell of a lot better than I did with an under one year old!!

to you!

sillymilly I hope you are beginning to understand that the way you see yourself right now bears no relation to the way you actually look! You're so perty!
I like you with both hair colours, so fair play for being able to pull both off. Interesting that many people have said to you in RL that you seem more like a blonde person. Sometimes it's hard to get the full picture in a photo.

A great coat, boots, and some skinny jeans will make you feel 1000 times better straight away. Have you ever looked at ASOS? When money is tight, I have to say, they're a good option. The ASOS own brands are cheap but not necessarily nasty, the website is fabulous (you can see the models walking in the clothes an' all), delivery is quick, and returns are straightforward. Plus, they often have discounts.

Hey Milly,

It's taken me 3.5 years to realise not only has my size changed but so has my body shape. I had to stop thinking in terms of myself as a certain size but as a person. I was an 8/10 before my child and am lucky if I fit into a 14 these days and after finally giving up smoking I've decided that if I'm healthier but heavier than I was before my child then so be it.

I do think that you're right in as much as having no one significant in your life can make an impact on how you think others perceive you but as you've found here everyone here, including myself think you look great as a brunette.

Primark ultra soft ultra skinny are my new jeans that I live in as they're higher in the rise and aren't hipsters are better for me as my tummy is my biggest area for concern. Things I never thought I'd consider before like scarves/accessories/floatier tops and dresses and a lot of colour to make sure I stand tall coz I know I can be seen.

PS I have a 9mo and am sitting here typing with stains all down my front, a scraggy topknot, and a really shitty cardigan on. It just is what it is, isn't it?And I love fashion.

Actually I rather liked the blonde, but I think the problem with both colours is that they are very blocky. Highlights/lowlights would break up either colour and lift it.

Re the cut, at the age of DS agree let simplicity be your friend. Either super short so you can blow it out like mine in

Bugger, ds has woken so I need to go - thankyou all for your comments, I will reply properly but it will prob be tomorrow now or i'll be a zombie.

I've pulled off some coat links I'd love an opinion on tomorrow if that was ok?

Thank you all again (I sound like a broken record but I really am grateful)

I agree with EnjoyVampirebloodResponsibly your hair looks too blocky in both those photos, highlights or low lights would be really pretty and instantly give you a lift.

Can I just say, I read your OP and expected to see someone completely different to the person in the pictures. Have fun with your look and enjoy trying new stuff.
Please don't be so hard on yourself.

I would recommend the M&S 5 pocket jeggings. High waisted and in loads of colours. I have dark blue denim, a lighter denim and black. Really comfy and keep any muffin top at bay. I think if you get some nice boots and a smartish coat you can get away with pretty much whatever underneath.

I have just bought a £19.50 coa from asda and lots of people have commented on how nice it looks. Comes in black, red, rose pink and a few others I think. I look quite tidy when I am pretty scruffy underneath.

Loads of places have nice cheap patterned scarves. Some different coloured ones can really make an outfit.

Look at a blog like schoolgatestyle. That's really good for some nice simple ideas that look trendy and all done fairly cheaply.

You are pretty so shouldn't take much to make you feel nice again.

You're very pretty. I understand how you feel though and got to this stage and my mum took me for a makeover. It was the best thing ever, I started to get my self confidence back. it's amazing how low you feel when you're still carrying the extra baby weight.
I'm another vote for brunette with low lights, it'll add interest. Along with lots of layers to give it body.
As for clothes, get a capsule wardrobe. Pick things that will mix and match. Say 2 skirts and or 2 trousers and 4 tops that will go with either. On a tight budget that will be your best bet then accessorise with scarves, necklaces, hats and belts etc to keep the look fresh.
Good luck with it and please post a pic tomorrow after the hairdresser has worked their magic

First off congratulations on that lovely cute baby he is adorable. Your hair looks fab as a brunette lop an inch or two off nice choppy layers and if you want to add a little colour I would go for caramel highlights. I am the same colouring as you and look washed out with too much blonde.
Next do highwaisted jeans in bootcut and skinnies they are FANTASTIC if you order online before 9pm they arrive next day. Another plus is you can pay online like just like a cataloge like you do with very.