Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Style and beauty

Looking for style advice? Chat all about it here. For the latest discounts on fashion and beauty, sign up for Mumsnet Moneysaver emails.

The Worst perfume ever!

999 replies

anniewoo · 28/09/2012 19:54

Was in HOF today and as i have no money at the moment to spend (despite their sale) decided to cheer myself up with a spray ( or two) of their posh perfumes. Big Mistake- sprayed Serge lutyens Tuberose Criminale- and it was!!!! Well the smell was criminal- like camphor, moth balls mixed with wintergreen , that awful muscle rub stuff. Jesus wept and it lasts and lasts and lasts. Can't kill it off, despite Annick Goutal Ninfeo Mio on my other wrist. You have been warned.....Though i do dare you!!!

OP posts:
YouOldSlag · 07/10/2012 10:53

I've just tried Cabochard by Gres and it smells like men's talc from the 70s. However, after about 2 hours it smells quite posh and spicy. I just don't want to smell like talc for two hours in order to get the payoff!

DonaAna · 07/10/2012 11:33

Slag I need to find my Cabochard sample. In the meantime, many of the older classics smell of something that we associate with the past. I wore yesterday Calandre by Paco Rabanne - it felt very dated. It's a bit like vintage clothing - some love it, others don't see the point. Today I'm wearing Tabac Blond by Caron. While it is a great and very sensual female classic (almost 100 years old!) I personally feel even better in modern leather and tobacco perfumes (some of them masculines: 1740 Marquis de Sade and Antaeus).

What I've tried to explain all along is that there is middle ground between insignificant but much-marketed mainstream (I also wore Fan di Fendi yesterday - a loud and shrill white floral) and classic female perfumes in the school of Chanel 5, but finding the right balance requires some exploring.

GetOrfAKAMrsUsainBolt · 07/10/2012 11:35

what a lovely thread - I will come back to read it fully with the links later.

I really dislike the plain, watery 90s perfumes like l'eau d'issey and escape by calvin klein. They smell of nothing.

Someone bought me that floral crap by kenzo and I disliked it because it smelled so bland and pretty.

My all time favourite perfume is l'heure bleu by guerlain, followed by shalimar. I just love the way they smell on me, both of them really strong initially but they both fade down to a beautiful and warm scent after afew hours which lasts all day.

I wear the guerlian acqua allegorica scents in the summer usually, I love guerlain.

GetOrfAKAMrsUsainBolt · 07/10/2012 11:44

ooh x posts re l'heure bleu pinot. I have worn it since my early 20s and I love it, it used to be impossible to buy where I lived and had to cadge favours from someone going to London (to get it from harrods or allders) or someone flying from Heathrow.

It is a beautiful slightly sombre perfume iyswim. I think the feeling of melancholy may be because I know it was created on the eve of world war one (hence the name) and evokes that feeeling induced by that famous quote ' the lamps are bing put out all over europe; we shall not see them lit again in our lifetime'

YouOldSlag · 07/10/2012 11:45

DonaAna- yes, I can totally get why Cabochard has been around for so long- I bought a 50th anniversary bottle. it seems to say "I may smell like talc at first, but bear with me, I know what I'm doing". and it is sooo leather and tobacco. It smells like a brand new leather jacket sitting in an incense filled room (churchy incense not cheap joss sticks).

HyvaPaiva · 07/10/2012 11:55

Just got a free sample of Bulgari BLVII. At first, it's a creamy violet reminiscent of Dior's Dolce Vita. Dry, it's watery sugar. Often I'm in the mood for a saccharine floral (I wear Flowerbomb daily but it has depth and develops to a heady sugary spice on me) but BLVII is most unremarkable on my skin. This doesn't come as a surprise since I've just fallen for the femme fatale that is Fracas!

DonaAna · 07/10/2012 13:05

Great perfume expertise on this thread! Keep it coming!

The watery perfumes seemed revolutionary when they came out - minimalistic and pure after loud headache-inducing 1980s. The discovery of new synthetic materials (Calone for example) allowed perfumers to create olfactory landscapes that were not possible before and people loved them. But we got too much of them and got bored.

HyvaPaiva, really many mass market perfumes go for the lowest common denominator - watery, sugary, berry-like, candy-like. They are made to be smelled on the strip - often the first minutes are the best of it (if you do not believe me, smell the Jimmy Choo perfume). This style is called linear - the perfumes so not evolve, what you smell at first is what you get until the end.

Older perfumes are often built differently. The perfume goes through different stages that can be quite distinct. Take First by Van Cleef & Arpels (made by JC Ellena in classical style). Opening: hairspray and soap. Middle: a radiant huge bouquet of flowers Final stage: voluptuous, sensual skin scent. In a nutshell, First takes you from monastery to bordello via the flower shop. It tells a story, it takes you on a journey.

Linear is not necessarily better or worse than the traditional pyramid- shaped perfume structure. There are great and lovely linear fragrances. For example the modern scent L'Amendiere by Heeley captures to moment of biting into a black cherry and makes it last several hours - a miracle! Philosykos is also a linear fragrance - many of you would say a great one.

Tabac Blond has been on my wrist for four or five hours. It seems stronger and more sensual now and. Perfumes that are heavy and dense stay much longer on skin - very heavy molecules cannot fly away quickly. Light and fresh scents, particularly citruses, evaporate very quickly and are fleeting (there are tricks to make them last longer, but their nature is to evaporate very fast).

YouOldSlag · 07/10/2012 13:07

First takes you from monastery to bordello via the flower shop

What an erudite and beautiful picture you have painted Dona Ana!

GetOrfAKAMrsUsainBolt · 07/10/2012 13:49

Your posts are fabulous Dona Ana.

MrsSchadenfreude · 07/10/2012 13:52

I am wearing Ivoire by Balmain today. DH hates it and says it smells like sweaty knickers. I also have the lighter version which doesn't provoke such an extreme reaction in him!

This thread has inspired me - I live very close to the Guerlain shop on the Champs Elysees and will try and get down there next week to do some sniffin'.

fedupofnamechanging · 07/10/2012 13:58

DonaAna, I couldn't open your link. What was the headline of the article and I will search for it.

FermezLaBouche · 07/10/2012 14:02

Did anyone else, in their youthful foolishness, ever buy those rip-off perfumes with slightly changed names, that were a fraction of the cost of the proper ones? I bought one called "Joey Girl" which was of course a foul rip-off version of Tommy Girl.
My God, it was VILE and lasted for hours. What was I thinking?

UltraBOF · 07/10/2012 14:09

I do love flowerbomb too- I've still got some left from last year. I think though from reading the 'basenotes' site after enjoying this thread so much, that the common factor in a lot of perfumes I love is a bit of patchouli in the heart, old hippy that I am. My next mission is to find something a bit special for DP!

Pinot · 07/10/2012 15:08

Donna Karan Fuel for Men, Boffy. Oldie but a goodie.

I love Flowerbomb but the new mens version (Spicebomb) is just flat-out-spice. Like the herbs aisle at Tesco.

Pinot · 07/10/2012 15:08

Prada Luna Rosso is a naice mens one - fresh and wet kind of sexy.

UltraBOF · 07/10/2012 15:11

Yes, it's got to smell sexy. Maybe not in a sweaty knickers way though Grin

CointreauVersial · 07/10/2012 15:11

I feel inspired by this thread! So interesting.

I have a drawerful of perfumes; a legacy from several years working in the fragrance business (and DH currently works for Procter & Gamble, purveyors of perfume for the masses), but I normally regard perfume as nothing more than a "nice smell". The equivalent of lift music, if you like - people might notice my perfume, but no-one is ever going to go "wow" or "ugh".

My everyday perfumes are the ubiquitous fruity florals DonaAna has mentioned (and back in the day I certainly worked my way through many of the 1980s horrors like Knowing and Ysatis, and every 16-year-old's favourite Anais Anais), but perhaps, like with wine, my palate is changing - I really feel inspired to try a new direction and experiment with something a bit more interesting than the safe options.

So thanks for all the amazing tips and suggestions, I have ordered some samples and we shall see.....

YouOldSlag · 07/10/2012 15:39

I live very close to the Guerlain shop on the Champs Elysees

Schadenfreude- you appear to be living my dream life- there seems to have been a mix up!

DonaAna · 07/10/2012 17:59

Karma "One Nosy Dame".
Cointreau I have a similar story - got tired of the muzak, started reading about perfume on Makeupalley, Fragrantica and Basenotes, wanted to know what I was missing and there is no turning back Wink. I have quieter times when I'm so busy with work and life that I just wear a handful of tried-and-true favorite perfumes - and then there are times when I'm actively exploring and trying something new every day. To me, perfume is like books and films - something that keeps me active. Couldn't do just one signature perfume, far too many really great ones out there to suit different situations and moods.
MrsSchadenfreude I wish I lived near the Guerlain boutique. Italy is one of the best places on in the world for great perfume (passers-by wear interesting and sophisticated things and you should see how confidently old men select great things), but boutique Guerlains are difficult to come by here.

I have great respect for makers of functional fragrance. Our elevator smells great (more adventurous than your average mainstream perfume) - someone has given real thought to how to fragrance the floor cleaner. Some of the soaps are made by great parfumeurs. When I lived in Brazil, Johnson baby products or all-purpose ouse detergents were available in 20 different formulations, and washing powders were musky roses. And a lot of money and thought goes into developing fragrances for shampoos, skin lotions and creams.

Please tell me more about Ivoire de Balmain! Don't think I have it.

fedupofnamechanging · 07/10/2012 18:17

Thank-you

fedupofnamechanging · 07/10/2012 18:26

Just read that article - thank you so much DonaAna. I can't wait for my delivery now and think I might have to buy Covet, too, just to see where she went with her ideas.

DonaAna · 07/10/2012 18:47

Great Karma. If you'd like to read more, here is another article by CB from the New Yorker. Not your usual women's magazine story.

fedupofnamechanging · 07/10/2012 19:19

That was really interesting - love Chanel No5 and Coco Mademoiselle. Am not familiar with Hermes, but will be looking out for them so I can see how they compare. I have never really thought about the process of creating a perfume before, or how much/little involvement celebrities have with the creations they put their names to.

NellVarnish · 07/10/2012 20:37

Thanks DonaAna, our planes were certainly fragrant ...

I love citrus fragrances and wear Guerlain Aqua Allegoria Mandarin Basilic in the summer - used to love Pampleune until one of stewards I flew with told me it smelt like cat wee. Have a bottle of Chanel Chane Eau Fraiche which I quite like too but I'm hankering over something more autumnal hence the JM Pom Noir obsession. I tried their Blackberry and Bay in the shop a couple of week ago which smelt like I was foraging around in a hedgerow. Suppose I'm quite fruity person then ... Wink

UltraBOF · 07/10/2012 20:42

Oh DonaAna, what have you sparked in me? I have just ordered a sample of Ambre Narguilé...

Swipe left for the next trending thread