Crash diets - any advice?

[EleonoraDuse]

My weight has always been a fairly steady size 10/12, but my mum died a few months ago after being ill for a year. I spent this period eating ALL THE THINGS.

So I now need to lose about a stone. I have no interest in long-term healthy eating plans. I want to drop the bereavement-belly super quickly and once I've done this I can return to not really thinking about my weight, I hope.

So...crash diets? Any recommendations for a good one? I don't mind if it's super-hardcore as long as it works and it's quick.

Paul McKenna, I can make you thin. The reason why you (and most people) are overweight is due to psychological reasons not because you are hungry. Basically you need to eat when you're hungry, stop when you're full, eat what you want (or you'll only crave it) enjoy every mouthful. He gives you technics on how to do this. It sounds like this is how you used to be. Tune in to how you used to relate to food x

Right - got it. So here's the plan:

After doing my week of Evil (Possibly Carcinogenic, Definitely Metabolism Fucking) Crash Diet, I must stop eating Twixes and Skips and cheese toasties with mayo and brownies and Jammie Dodgers and cheese and ham croissants. Eat three sensible meals a day. Occasionally have the odd lard sarndwich if I fancy it, otherwise eat grapes or similar.

Exercise... nope. Could not bear it. It is horrid. I'm a teacher so on feet all day anyway, which is basically a workout, right?

Ok, so I'm thinking cabbage soup for Evil (Possibly Carcinogenic, Definitely Metabolism Fucking) Crash Diet. Does it have to be cabbage? Could it just be homemade veg soup, i.e. a load or carrots and stuff blended up with water and stock cube?

Why did you even ask if you were just going to ignore everyone's advice?

OP didn't ignore everyone's advice - it's more that people ignored her original question :)

Errr, yeah. What twiglets said, innit. I am grateful for folk taking the time to reply, but I was clear from the outset that I didn't want a long-term healthy eating plan....

Right. But it makes no sense because crash diets don't work.

It's like me saying "where can I go in the UK on holiday that's guaranteed to be sunny, don't recommend me non-sunny places".

People COULD say "oh go to Ilfracombe, guaranteed year-long sun" or "get to Aberdeen, positively balmy" or they COULD just say, "OP, you are not going to get what you want (sun/thin waist) from what you are proposing (UK/crash diet). Try Spain."

Crash diets do work in the short-term. Obviously they're going to cause you metabolism problems if you do them long term and it's not a healthy way to do it - but I think everyone knows this and I'm sure that OP is no different.

Eleonora, I've heard great things about SlimFast for a month or so. I couldn't do it but people I know who have said they lost weight really quickly at first and then went onto a sensible diet after that. I also meant to say I'm so sorry about your mum :(

The thing is OP- if you don't exercise all that you will lose on a crash diet is mainly fluid and muscle.

I am sure you know that muscle burns more calories than fat, so in the medium term after a crash diet you will put the weight back on more easily- despite your previous history of being able to sat slim.

The point is- what you'd normally eat to keep in shape may- after a crash diet- be more than you need and the weight will go back on faster than you can say Twiglets.

Exercise is not just for keeping trim- it's about cardio health, and reducing cancer risks.

Walking round a classroom or corridors won't raise your heart rate- though 4B on a wet Friday afternoon might- which is why exercise is a good idea:)

I don't think putting 5kg on in a year is too bad after losing it within 3w. Bear in mind I'd completely gone for it in Vegas and over Christmas, plus I eat out at least once a week.

I fully intend to do it again as a quick fix, but this time will try to do a pure protein day once a week to maintain the weight loss afterwards, we'll see

And each time you do it swoosh, you will find it harder to lose the weight, which will also then go back on faster than before because you are further screwing your metabolism into survival mode...but if you are happy to continue down that route of classic yo yo dieting then obviously its your choice [shrug].

I'm very sorry to hear about your Mum.

I did a crash diet for 2 months before my wedding, went from large size 14 to slim 10. It was just a mix of many diets

• v low carbs - lived on raw veg, sushi, veg soup, chicken No bread and no fruit, no fat obv.

No alcohol Slim fast ready made shakes when hungry and work wouldn't allow for anything healthy.

It worked, I looked fab on the day, I evened out at a size 12 a few months after which I still am to this day. So in my experience some crash diets do work.

Dukan all the way. I lost 10lb in about 10 days. Weight has stayed off & now I just don't over indulge in carbs. I quite liked the diet as I love fish & veg! Good luck.

Long term crash diets won't work and yup quit shovelling crap in your mouth
I would say try eat protein in the mornings - eggs / fish usually good to keep you going
I find bananas great as an energy and sugar boost
Dark chocolate is my one treat - Lindt yum
The big thing that works for me after years of trying Is to find an exercise I enjoy - I love love swimming and surprisingly I m good at it now I swim 4 times a week mosty
What about the shred DVD - would you do that even?!
Exercise helps build muscles and tone the bits that are flabby and wobbly and burn extra calories - so make the diets so much more effective
Plus can help with the mental health side of things (headspace/ endorphins etc)