Tonight Matthew I'm going to be smart casual....

[Honeydragon]

...at a lunch. Various arseholes will be there. I need some sort of Jeans (pockets are require so leggings out), Top, Footwear combo. I need to look like I haven't tried at all, and like I am naturally effortlessly chic and on trend (and slim I have a muffin top)

I am 5.3", size 10/12 and have shoulder length light brown hair.

Budget is fuck all (although I do have £40 of M&S vouchers)

Any ideas what I should be looking at? I am the sole defence for my DMiL at this do, and want to do her proud.

strike out fail, might as well shout MY NAME IS HONEYDRAGON & I HAVE A MUFFIN TOP THAT WILL NOT QUIT.

That was oddly therapeutic

I am taking a total leap in the dark here but AWear can be pretty good for some stylish but less pricey clothes.

For a nice luch I am thinking something like
this shirt

or this

this tunic

All worn with skinny jeans and heels - are any of these things that you would wear?

mands this has pockets and is lovely and from marks. Maybe with black heeled boots and patterned/coloured tights?

M&S do quite a big selection of jeans nowadays, so that might be worth a starting gander. What sort of place is it? That will make a big difference as to how you then 'dress' the jeans. For something fairly simple, heeled ankle boots (funky not mumsy ones), a plain cowl neck top and biker jacket or blazer could work.

She's short though, Noddy. M&S dresses often v frumpy length for short people. I don't like that, personally.

Dorothy Perkins do high waisted skinny jeans that might be good for muffin top?

It's a pub, but private room. I am 33 and dress like a student circa 1992 (I know, I know)

I like the blouses, but they might be a little fussy for me. Are M&S jeans good? I had a nice pair of straight legs from there a couple of years ago but they tend to get loose as the day goes on.

The average age of the alpha bitches there are mid to late 40's and IIRC very much per una specizale types

I want to try and get away with looking like I'm still in my 20's

Oooh blazers! Never though of that!

I should never have got rid of my Jaegar blazer, but it was red and had ran out of places to wear it.

Well,
a) you are size 10
b) you will not be wearing Per Una
You're already going to look better than everybody else there! :)

M&S jeans aren't brilliant but they are cheap and they do come in different lengths. I prefer Oasis ones but they seem to be fiendishly expensive nowadays.

Decent jeans, blouse type top and shoe boots. M&S often do nice shoe boots. Interesting bit of jewellery (maybe big ring or earrings) would be cheap as chips and make a difference

I bought this from DP and it's gorgeous

Any good?

oh and is it nosey to ask why you are going to dinner with people you don't like?

oooh I like the butterfly top, cut and length is really nice.

So skinnies are the way forward?

I saw a lovely pair of pink bootcuts but suspect they are not the way forward?

I like bootcut jeans but only when worn with brightly coloured converse type shoes and I don't think this is the look you are aiming for?

Family, dh's uncles birthday, he has been unwell and dotes on dh so we ought to go. His dd is the main protaginist and her and my SiL can be evil when together and are awful to MiL (she is quite old fashioned in her views and put upon, they have said awful things to her over the years)

At my wedding the Uncles daughter insulted my mother (called her a drunk as she was drinking , said the bridesmaids looked cheap, reduced MiL to tears and then spent the latter part of the evening throwing up after she drank all the champagne and loudly proclaiming dh and I would be divorced by the end of the year. The rest of them are no better hence dh and I largely avoid.

She generally tries the old smarmy nice to your face, bitch behind your back routine, so don't want to give her any visual ammunition.

I want to look good enough (in an age appropriate way) to impress the younger element of the family and show up the others. Bit of extra confidence never goes amiss.

Oh god I sound so juvenile

Deffo like the skinny jeans boyfriend blazer look (are you allowed to wear that with Converse too?)

yes converse would be for with friends

No to Converse. I bought a maxi skirt in Topshop yesterday (inspired by the grunge thread on here last week) and I was amazed by a) the quality and b) how terribly flattering it is. It is a long column shape and looks like nothing on the hanger but then I put it on and it made me look six inches taller, six inches slimmer and gave me a 'proper' bum in the way that only Vivienne Westwood has ever done for me before. V cheap too. I wore it last night with a cowl nck top (v similar to the FC one Seven posted - the other top that Seven posted is v shapeless and unflattering irl btw: I tried it on yesterday!) heeled boots and biker jacket.

Might be worth a try if you didn't want to go the jeans route. Would be lovely with a denim jacket too.

I like this blazer?