the reflection in the mirror vs reality

[DestinationUnknown]

Not sure where to put this ... anyway just wondering if anyone else has this "problem" - I look at myself in the mirror, think I look ok, then see myself in photos and realise I am overweight, with bad hair and terrible receding jawline (if that is such a thing).

How can this be? How can I be so blind to my looks / overweight ishoos when it's all there in front of me? And how can I see myself more honestly / critically in the mirror, as I'd like to do something about it?!

I have this too and nicknamed it body eumorphia! No particular advice except that just do what you're doing and probably take steps to develop your personality as even if you really aren't 'all that' you'll be gorgeous anyway (I know lots of very attractive people who actually... Aren't its their personality). I know that sounds like old fashioned advice but probably best in the long run as everyone ends up wrinkly and grey in the end.

I looked awful in photos when I was 20, never mind now I'm 45. And yes, not quite so ugly in the mirror . Just not photogenic I think - or else I'm deluding myself that the mirror is more representative than the photos.

I look awful in photos too and shop windows. This is made infinitely worse by the fact that my mirror makes me look about two sizes smaller than I actually am! Reverse body dysmorphia is my term for it!! Sorry have no advice just wanted to sympathise!

Isn't that a good thing?!

Far worse to look in the mirror and tell yourself you're overweight with bad hair and a receding jawline. So many people do that and their self esteem rock bottom!

Keep telling yourself how fab you are but keep reminding yourself that you need to keep the exercise/healthy eating up. A hypnotherapy book/CD would help. Paul McKenna, Marisa Peer and Glenn Harrold are all very good. Next time you look at a photo of yourself you will probably be more beautiful and a bit thinner!

I have this. I partly put it down to the fact that when I look in the mirror, I breathe in, hold my tummy muscles tight (to the extent they still exist), tilt my pelvis so my bum is sightly smaller and have just smoothed down my top, pulled up my trousers etc. Roll on a few minutes and my stomach sags forward, my bum tilts out more, my trousers sag down a bit, my top hitches up a bit. And I tend to smile in the mirror when, if shop windows are anything to go by, I scowl a lot in everyday life. I just avoid shop windows & try not to see too many photos of myself and then I can continue with my deluded image of myself.

at body eumorphia!

feeling a bit better now to know I'm not entirely alone.

I read somewhere that everyone looks their best in their bathroom/bedroom mirror (whichever home mirror you use habitually) because you look into it with your relaxed, confident 'home' face on, which is not the face people tend to wear when out in the world. might be rubbish though

Is it because one's reflection is the wrong way round in the mirror so in photos one looks different?

(not sure when I started saying "one's")

I have this!

'tis very annoying. I go out thinking I look great ok and then see the photo's later and and think, my god, how did that happen not n a good way!

I really hate myself in photo's, they are never flattering too me. Show all my wrinkles and skin imperfections. Bleurgh!!

I have that too - even people that know me are shocked when they see me in photos!

I don't know what it is. If it was just me I would think that I was seriously deluded.

Oh yes. I know the feeling. Feeling quite smug when leaving home but by the time I'm passing a window display or a shop mirror - horror! Don't even get me started on photos. My ExP was wondering over my graduation photo how come I look like I have a round moon like face, when in reality it looks completely different with blusher created cheek bones and rather slim.

Has your appearance changed considerably in a relatively short period of time? It sounds like your mind's image of yourself has not kept up with changes in your physique. That is what happened to me, anyway. I put on 10 kgs in a few years and seriously couldn't recognize myself in photos because what I saw in mirrors did not look like my pictures.

I lost those 10 kgs, btw. People say I look so different but I don't see a difference. In the mirror, I look the same but at least I can recognize myself in photos now