Fabulous at 40+: your (non-surgery) style and beauty wish list

[CakeandRoses]

Turning 40 in a few months and I'd like some ideas as to 'stuff' I could have done or buy which would make me feel I'm entering my 41st year looking better rather than worse.

I have long layered reddy-brown hair which I'm happy with except the colour, until very recently I didn't need to colour it as I don't have much grey but I used a home-dye a few weeks ago and wasn't that pleased with the results

My skin's pretty good, very few wrinkles except one between my eyes (which I dislike) and a couple on my forehead (which I don't mind).

My body is generally fine and I'm reasonably happy with it. I'm a size 10 - 12, a few pounds heavier than 'usual' but I'm confident I'll lose it when I stop bf my 11mo baby at some point. My tummy is almost flat again and has no stretch-marks really. Some cellulite and stretch-marks on arse and tops of thighs from puberty which I dislike but not convinced there's much that will really improve them. My boobs will probably leave a lot to be desired once I finish bf.

My teeth are good (have had them whitened and a couple of veneers years ago).

I love make-up, I know what suits me and I update it often so I don't think any radical changes are needed here.

I feel like I'm a bit lost clothes-wise as I've spent the last 4 years in maternity/post-pg/bf-friendly clothes and have loads of clothes i'm not sure suit or fit me properly now but I'm struggling to see what I should keep or give to Oxfam. I'm not interested in fashion per se but love beautiful clothes, colours and prints. Monsoon's probably the high street shop closest to summing up the kind of thing i like. I like to look groomed but a bit eclectic/boho (sorry I know that sounds twatty, just very hard to describe one's style without sounding like a twat, imo)

Sorry, huge OP but wanted to give a clear picture of where the problem areas are/aren't.

My wish list so far:

• Wardrobe clear-out and then buy some new clothes (not sure what yet aside from some flattering jeans, possibly Levi Curve IDs which I was recommended on here)

• Personal stylist (a one-off consultation thingy) - worth it?

• Hair coloured at salon - is this worth doing regularly rather than doing at home?

• Botox on my between the eyes frown line (really not sure about this as I've always considered myself 'not a botox-person' whatever the fuck that is, maybe I've just not seen anyone who it's made look better, only women who look obviously botoxed and not at all younger)

• I already have Crystal Clear micro-dermabrasion once a month (which I really rate) plus pedicures and Decleor facials

Oh stylish ones, please tell me what else I should add to this list (money no object-ish)

Sorry forgot to get back to this post. I use 30% glycolic acid peels same as the sizzlers thread. Rosemary Conely sells the FacialFlex.

I have some time on my hands for the next couple of months so I'm now experimenting with the following - would love any feedback on any of these...

Eva Fraser's facial exercises
Carol Maggio facial exercises
15% glycolic acid night cream
Tracy Anderson Cardio workout - to burn calories along with health diet
Tracy Anderson post pregnancy workout - to tone stomach

Any opinions on the following would be gratefully received:

Silk pillows
Caci treatment
Fillers under eyes or naso folds (not got money at the moment)
Copper peptides
Vitamin A cream

I do believe that you can make improvements on a budget but need to give it time and energy which is the difficult part...

I use silk pillowcases, not sure if they work or not. But not too £££ so worth a punt.
Caci I find v good, but you need to do it every 3 or 4 weeks to maintain. The oxygen add-on treatment is sposed to be like a mild Botox effect too.

Off the shelf skin care does virtually nothing at, ahem, our age. Botox between eyes for the 11s is transformational - do it! CACI pretty good but gotta get serious at this stage. Fillers are the next rung on the ladder and a bit more scary (and painful!). Crank up the fish/nuts/water intake too. Perricone diet. Sunscreen every day without fail. Look after your feet too. Things they start a-changing at 40! Was all a piece of piss before 40! Oh yeah and thank the lord every single day that you have the good health and wherewithal to consider your appearance. Health is everything.

silver really put the work in and learn the Maggio exercises thoroughly. Just like you did with the callanetics (me too, and I also swear by it). The facercise really really does work. I can see the difference if I miss a week. Cannot recommend them highly enough.

Tattywhen you have a min would you please advise me re home hair colour? I've been having the inoa one, with some permanent on my grey streak. Medium neutral brown. Money is tight and I could do with cutting out the colourist but I don't know where to start.

Liquid eye liner

If you're going to use sunscreen every day, then you need vitamin D. Most people are very low on this, and it's essential for the body to access calcium.

If you're going to use sunscreen every day, then you need vitamin D. Most people are very low on this, and it's essential for the body to access calcium.

Thanks for the replies. I bought a slightly less pale foundation today and it seems to have made a difference. Also bought some liquid liner.

Madmomma - how long did it take you to see a difference with Carole Maggio facial exercises? What sort of improvements did you see? Any tips? I just received her Facercise DVD this morning. Also, have you ever tried any of Eva Fraser's facial exercises?

To add to what everyone else has said I'd suggest you get a printerst account if you don't have one already and have a search for fashion/style. If you pin all the looks you like without over thinking it too much and then once you've spent hours (it's so addictive) you can pour over the images and see which looks you could replicate/would suit you etc.

silver the first part is learning the exercises properly. Once you've learned them I'd say a week of doing them every day and you'll be pleased with the results. My main problem is my undereyes, and there's an advanced exercise further on that's brilliant. The ones to slim the face I miss out, cos my face is thin. You'll probably find there's a couple you can comfortably miss out. The improvements for me were over my whole face. My eyes were much, much less puffy -both the lid and the undereye, my cheeks were fuller and higher (I have a flattish face so this is good!) The lip ones are bloody marvellous, and I just do them all while I watch TV. My lips definitely look much fuller now. It's exciting. I'm dying to hear how you get on - you must report back. Yes I tried Eva Fraser - I think hers are more like facial yoga, whereas the maggio ones are like callanetics - if that makes sense?

Thanks for that info madmomma, have had the book for ages and you have inspired me to open it

go for it sprout!

Madmomma did you use the exercises from her book or DVD? I have both but think the DVD does not all the exercises in the book but need to check further to be sure.

I want to address puffiness and some hollowing under the eyes along with naso lines and lines that go from the side of the lip towards the chin - don't know what they are called. Which exercises are good for those areas? Don't want to make my face much thinner and not broader...

silver I used the book, but I bet it'd be quicker to learn them from the dvd actually. I didn't know there was one.
From the 14 essential exercises (that's what they're called in the book anyway) I'd concentrate on 1,2 & 3 for your eyes and get straight onto the first 'progressive' exercise which is called 'under-eye hollow lift'

With regard to the naso lines and the marionette lines, try ex 9 of the essentials 'nasal labial smoother' and ex 7 'mouth corner lift' - no 7 should affect the lip to chin lines.

Madmomma I have now been doing Carole Maggio exercises for 2 weeks and I can see a slight difference. Some of the puffiness has gone not sure about the hollowing yet as it looks different depending on the light. My chin and neck are much more toned. I have been doing the new facercise exercises but will go back to the book and do all of those as I want to be able to do a bit of spot training. Do the results get better week by week? Do you think after 8 weeks there may be a significant improvement?

Botox

Honestly

silver it's dead hard to think back to when I first started, and as I don't have the dvd I'm not sure if the exercises are the same on there as the ones in the book. My undereye puffiness was really bad and I noticed the full difference within a fortnight of doing the exercises properlyand religiously every day for a fortnight. But it took me a while to be confident that I was doing them properly IYSWIM. Are you feeling the muscles really pull/burn?

I would agree with Cybbo - you can fanny with all the creams you like and the Mumsnet obesession with " a cut and colour" but Botox is simply miraculous.

It makes make up go on more easily, you look less tired etc BUT only other botoxers know! I think it should be free on the NHS.

Also agree colours ( depsite my grave misgivings) and that lash stuff. All of the above PLUS losing weight shaved at least 5 years off me.

madmomma thanks so much for that. I am seeing a difference with the puffiness and the hollows. I think one side of my face may be stronger than the other as the hollow is larger in one eye than the other. However, I have seen improvement in both eyes and really happy with the results in the eye will less hollow to begin with . From reading lots of posts of facial exercise it seems that the hollow look is due to cheek muscles dropping and that facial exercise helps to lift the cheek up again which reduces the hollow.

Puffiness is getting better too. When I wake up my eyes are puffy but after the exercise the puffiness is significantly reduced and improves during the day.

The marrionet lines are still there but I think more of a cheek lift is needed to remove those.

I am going to go start the exercises in the original Facercise book tomorrow as there are more exercises in them.

Aww you're so welcome silver I'm chuffed that you're seeing results.
Yes the hollows are due to dropping cheeks, and I can confirm that the cheek exercise in the original book (ex 4 'the cheek developer',) is brilliant.

Your perseverence and patience with learning and re-learning the exercises correctly will totally pay-off.

Hi madmomma I am really pleased with the results. Have you ever had any less than pleasant results during the transition stage? I have read on various forums that you can have good and bad days with all facial exercise regimes during the transition stage and then have great results.

Oh no I've never had anything dodgy. I guess the only thing I've had is if I've overworked my undereye area and not balanced it with working the top eyelid enough then my eyes can look a little more lidded than usual for a day or two, but not in an unpleasant way, and it's easily rectified.