Overweight and feeling like an ugly old slug.

[Loonytoonie]

After juggling 2 children under 5 and going back to Uni last year to do a post grad, I've been working hard every night when the little one's go to bed. Bad diet, eating late to stay away, snacking and no exercise, poor sleep (4 hours a night on average) has culminated in a 2 stone weight increase. My skin is awful and my hair is terrible. I look and feel like shite.

My clothes don't fit and I've noticed that I am not shedding it as easily as I used to. I'm 39 and I suppose age isn't helping. I've even noticed (and I'm deeply embarrassed about this, but I just have to tell someone) that even though I've put weight on in all the usual areas, I've even started to put weigh on on my lower regions (near my fanjo) so tight jeans just draws attention to my now fat fanjo . I'd probably laugh if I saw someone else write this, but I feel incredibly low about it.

I know I have to eat better, and eat less, and exercise. By starting doing all these things when I'm only just keeping everything else together seems an impossible task. If anyone reads this and wants to give my enormous arse a kick, please feel free.

Not to mention bingo wings and cellulite at the top of my arms..... dear god.

I dont have any useful advice but want to make sure you know you're not the only one (I especially know what you mean about the fanjo fat )

At least you are making the effort to make changes to your routine! And yes, my weight loss has certainly become a lot slower than before I had DC, and I cant blame my age as Im only mid-twenties!

You sound so low I just had to respond. You have been working so hard and juggling everything for months now and I think it sounds like you've suddenly pulled up and thought SHIT!!! Feeling like shit means that you THINK you look like shit so that is a vicious circle. Does that make sense??! I totally sympathise as I had a similar wake up call last year when I turned 40. I found a gym with a creche, bit the bullet and felt sooo much better for it. Gives you head space too and you can feel smug and virtuous . That said I am now crippled with sciatica and can't even drive never mind walk but I can feel the weight creeping on and it gets me down. As for fat fanjo (me too )- longer tops or drapey dress and leggings might work? Oh, maybe try new hairdresser too?

Can sympathise as am def a dress size (or prob nearer 2 if I'm honest) larger since having 2 DC's in last 4 years. I was 40 in April. The first single thing I do to feel better is have a really good cut & colour done. I had a fringe cut in and really bright highlights and looked and felt a good few years younger. I also had a personal stylist session at Gap (totally free) and they didn't try to foist stuff on me that was ridiculous, just bought some stuff for me to try based on my likes and some bits I would probably have never picked out. They are practically always in sale, as are alot of similar shops, so doesn't have to cost loads. Don't wear tight jeans, they are just too flippin' uncomfortable anyway. Try leggings under dresses or tunics. Put a bit of make up on everyday just to freshen up, I fell into trap of not bothering if just at home with kids and it makes you feel crap. Have lost no weight yet, but have been on a couple of (very slow) jogs with a mum mate recently and makes me feel thinner and virtuous if nothing else. Nowhere near as bad as I expected...and free!

You sound really low - and no wonder, you've got loads going on in your life and you're not getting a chance to look after yourself properly.

So, its time to focus on you. Can you build in exercise into your daily life? Doesnt have to be an exercise dvd - walking everywhere will do for a start. When you feel more active, you feel better (or at least I do). You could shred if you can spare 25 minutes a day - but sounds like that cant happen right now. Make sure you're drinking lots of water and eating the right kind of stuff. Try (I know it sounds easy to say but hard to do) to get a good nights sleep - set yourself a dedicated deadline for doing a piece of work in the evening, stick to it, go wind down and get to bed as relaxed as you can. Good luck.

oh love!! have a (((((((((((hug)))))))))) first!

now - i do know just how you feel, tbh i think its a rare woman who has felt comfy in her skin forever - im now nearing 50 and some days i bloody feel it!

for a start, dont try and do everything at once, that just sets you up for failure, my trick is to do ONE thing everyday just for me, at my most fed-up that would be shaving my legs/underarms etc, or making sure i have buffed and moisturised etc - i would suggest

monday, shave everything - cleanse face and use night cream before bed
tuesday, exfoliate and moisturise - cleanse face and use night crea, before bed
wednesday, get to hairdressers - cleanse face and use night cream before bed
thursday, do feet, paint nails/finger nails - cleanse face and use night cream before bed
friday, go through all your old bits of make-up and have a good, ruthless chuck out - cleanse face and use night cream before bed
saturday, go and treat yourself to some new make-up, face creams etc - cleanse face and use night cream before bed

sunday - go through your wardrobe and have a good chuck out of anything you dont feel good in! - nice long bath, use some smellies etc, just a half hour pamper can lift your spirits

follow that kind of pattern for a few weeks and i reckon you feel much better about yourself and feel much more like tackling the horny issues of diet and excercise!

just slowly slowly catchy the beautiful new you!

I KNEW SOMEONE WOULD SAY CUT AND COLOUR
lol at musment cliche

ok dora - so what is your ground-breaking suggestion?

Oh, first time ever posted here, had no idea was such a cliche...works for me!

liftthatup, these two sentences together made me chuckle: As for fat fanjo (me too )- longer tops or drapey dress and leggings might work? Oh, maybe try new hairdresser too?

Bloody hell, that is quite funny. Short back and sides?

I actually think the personal stylist idea is a good one. The gym and all that is great and you will feel better for doing some exercise but results take time to show and it would also be good to do something to make you feel better about yourself now. Having one outfit at least that you feel that you look nice in is such a spirit lifter.
Debenhams, John Lewis (and Gap already mentioned) do personal shoppers. You tell them what your budget is and you sit down with a cup of tea and a magazine while they go and find things for you to try on so quite a stress-free way to shop and they nearly always find things you'd never look at in a million years.
It sounds like you have worked incredibly hard and maybe you should give yourself a treat!

Well, this thread has at least made me . Thanks to you all for your kind words. You're right - I need to dust off the cobwebs, and start small. I'm going to tackle my unhealthy eating to start with and then think about more exercise.

not sure my hairdresser will appreciate me asking for a more southerly hair cut lol.

niminypiminy yes, thanks for bringing my attention back to the personal shopper. It's not something that I would ever have considered really, but since the contents of my wardrobe are either too tatty or too tight, I may go for a pamper.

you could just embrace the fat fanny and vajazzle it!

seriously, if you go the personal shopper route, take a friend and make a day of it!, nice lunch (salad! ) and a bit of shopping!

(please may i come? )