Help please, for the terminally un-photogenic

[tigana]

So. Just seen photos from recent party. I do not photograph well. At all. No way, no how.

Of particular concern at the moment, is that in photos I seem to have brown panda eyes going on. Soo attractive along with the strangely puffy face and questionable complexion. Particularly when I am (inevitiably) gurning like a arse .

So, magical cures please for corpse-eyes?!?

No cure I'm afraid but I feel your pain. Every time I get dressed up to go out I see a size 10, 25 year old gorgeous fox in the mirror, and when I peruse the photos afterwards I realise that I was abducted by aliens and an aged, lardy, dumpy, rather plain woman with bad teeth, a crooked jaw, uneven eyebrows and dreadful wrinkles has mysteriously taken my place. I'm starting to take it personally.

When I left house I knew I was a 32yo mum of one who could lose a stone or so and had spot appearing on her chin.

According to the photos I am a zombie.

I'm not really 25 you know. Or a size 10. But I'm always taken by surpise when the sad reality of me on the photo does not meet my expectations.

My top tip is to make sure your Facebook settings don't allow you to be tagged.

I also would love to know the secret of looking good in photos.

Not only do I look like a corpse in photos (I have quite a long, bony face), but often I look like a drunk corpse.

You know when you fish for compliments? You show someone a photo of yourself and say "don't I look awful?" in the hope that they'll go "no, no, you look great"? But my friends and family always go "err...yep, that's a really bad photo. You look like a corpse with a drink problem."

i have the same problem, its not you its the makeup....looking back at some recent photos i was wearing a new darker than usual blusher, benefits coralista if you must know, and i remember being really hot and flustered, the photos look good, i have my head tilted to the side and i'm holding a baby so my tummy is covered.

Most photos i love very ill because the flash makes me look even paler. Don't revlon do a photo something foundation?

I find the best way of remaining young and beautiful is to avoid mirrors and photographs altogether.

Brilliant idea - trouble is, you've never got proof of how beautiful you really look in that dress that is actually a 10 although it was mistakenly marked as a 16.

I wish

hang out with fatter older people and have your photos taken with them.

Nice for fat old people to have some company as well

Model friend taught me once:

• to minimize a double chin, press tongue up when photo is taken.

• don't look straight into the camera, a 3/4 face (slightly turned) always looks better.

• lips lightly parted and softly breathing (blowing) out defines cheekbones (you will see almost ALL models in mags do this)

-Gaze not into the camera, but slightly over

Chandon that made me laugh.

I tried to take some close up photos of my own neck for a necklace I was selling on Ebay. I went to great lengths to do whatever I thought was necessary to hold up/in a double chin and the result was that I looked like some scrawny demented old witch with odd muscular spasms.

there is no magical cure.

a good skin care regime, a little make up so long as it is good, and trying to have the camera above you when in a photo will all help though.

I was told in my youth to always look 4 inches above the camera...never directly into it.

Also, to lift the chin slightly so getting rid of possible jowls; to smile with your eyes, not a full-on maniacal grin showing all choppers and gums, just either lips together or every so slightly apart, showing a bit of tooth.

But remembering to do all that when you've partaken (liberally) of the full bodied red and you're glowing like you have a 40 degree temperature is not easy.

In most photos I forget all of this and look hollow eyed like Steve Buscemi with 4 chins.

Not good.

If you are the photographer at any gathering of adults there will inevitably be at least two women hurrying out of the line of the camera, holding books to their faces or holding their hands up, saying "No, no, don't get me in." This would appear to be the most common solution. :)

Airbrushing works, but I've not managed to master it for myself yet.

Sunglasses for the panda eyes.

Stand with most of you behind someone else. (my favourite).

Mineral makeup good (more reflective than others I've tried, without looking like a mask.)

Define your eyebrows (but no so much you look like Cruella de Ville on a bad day.)

Touche eclat v good, but if it's too light, blend in a bit of foundation, otherwise you get the opposite to panda eyes.

Do your hair so that you feel nice. Swishy hair is a great confidence booster, and you'll be feeling a bit more confident if you get caught in a lineup.

The only photos of me that I can look at without utter horror are ones where I have sunglasses on.

But would look extra daft wearing them inside, at night...although poss better to look extra daft than like zombie.

There is a photo of about 6 of us standing about chatting, everyone looks fine, even the ones caught mid-chat - except me - I seem to have one eye half closed, my mouth at an odd angle

Even with all these tips, there are some people that just aren't photogenic. I am one of them.

My makeup is fine in real life, I look ok-ish in real life - but in photos - eek! At least people do agree that the photos are NOT how I actually look in real life.

I now avoid photos, and have got my avoidance tactics down to a fine art. Weddings are more or less my exception but even then I will be on the back row and mostly hide. My family used to joke that were I ever abducted or in a tragic accident, they would be having to use the 20-year old school pics for the papers!

Sorry, there were no tips/cures in there, were there? Unless you count avoid pics as a tip?

Ohh, never go too heavy on the touche eclat to hide the circles. In photos this will show up as 'reverse panda', which looks even worse! And Bobbi Brown concealer (pen one), much better than Touche Eclat IMHO.

Don't use light-reflecting foundation or powder either; the flash will make you look very shiny indeed.