Style & Beauty? I have neither...come and help!

[LeslieWinkle]

I'd love some help, I'm feeling very fat and frumpy having just had DD2 8 weeks ago. I only had a small gap between my two pgs so still hadn't lost the first baby weight when I got pg again, hence now feeling a mahooosive size 16 (usually a 10 on top and 12 on bottom).

I have got a nice pair of straight leg jeans and a few pairs of boyfriend slouchy jeans which look ok and fit well. Other than that I just have a handful of cheap tee's that I panic bought when I realised my boobs now won';t fit into anything I already owned.

I can spend only about £100-150 and need a few ideas so that I could get a few half decent outfits cobbled together. When I'm around the house I'm happy in just anything but it'd be nice to have a few outfits that I can wear when I get invited out to friends for playdates etc so I don't feel so awful because of the state I look.

Any recommendations? I'm about 5ft4 and my problem areas are chunky thighs and a 'just had a baby' mummy tummy.

Well. I'm still sat here in one of my maternity tee-shirts 14 months on just cause I like it so I am not really one to be proffering suggestions but...

I would first of all go out and spend £20 on some cheapo jewellery from Sainsburys or Tescos or somewhere. It's amazing how wearing your normal clothes and bunging on some beads and a bangle can actually make you feel semi-human.

After that I'd work round what you have and feel comfortable in. So if you are OK with your jeans, then maybe a new pair of shoes or boots to go with those, perhaps a slight heel would make you feel a bit 'smarter' without breaking your neck if you're careering around after little ones.

Sounds like tops are the main problem. Do you want to show off your expanded norkage or hide it? V neck tops always flatter a larger bosom. A V neck semi fitted floaty tunic or kaftan top can work for daytime or evening depending on what you wear with it.

I luurve this one which would look great over jeans and this

Whoami - Yes, its def tops that I need. I feel like in the 2 years that I've been pg, bfeeding and then pg again the fashion has completely changed and I feel so very out of date.

I love both those tops you linked to, I was worried that a tunic would make me look even bigger than I am, though you're right that v-neck is the way forward. If you have great boobs you might as well use them to your advantage I guess. Plus, if everyone looks at the norkage then they aren't looking at the mummy tummy!

Leslie - know the feeling. You need wrap tops and dresses and lots of them. Look for thicker fabric than jersey - linen or wool crepe, or a firmish silk even. I kitted my self out for the summer with two silk long wrap tunics and two Betty Jackson linen wrap dresses (one BNWT)from eBay for about £75. I layer them over vest tops and wide leg trousers and will be layering them over long sleeved top or under knits for when it's colder. You could wear these over your jeans.

Speaking of which...look for knits which wrap but aren't tight across the tummy, or longer length cardies that do up with a single button somewhere between your bust and waist - Monsoon had one last year and it may turn up on eBay now, and usually they repeat styles the following year in a different colour. Or look for edge-to-edge cardigans with no fastenings.

Other tops to look for are ones that have scoop necks and pleating that drapes over rather than hugs the tummy; and anything that drapes in any other way which hides bumps and confuses the eye. Avoid empire line unless you want to look like you're expecting again.

I would wait until it gets a bit colder then get a funky trench coat, and some half decent necklaces that will jazz up a plain top. Make sure your hair looks nice and nice make up and you're half way there

Always look for single breasted coats. I'm the same shape as you onlya little taller and I've learned this the hard way.

I too love both the tops that whoami links to but the first would make me look pg because of the empire line gathering under the bust. The second is fab and my only worry would be the band around the bottom - would it make my hips look big?

Another good look for big tummy/big norks is a fitted shirt, unbuttoned to below the bust, worn with a vest top.

Seeing as your baby is young, carry them at all times in a baby sling, will hide your belly.

My baby is now 6 months and too heavy to be in the sling, so now i'm wearing leggings, loose longline vest tops, waterfall cardis,tunics have to be careful they dont make me look bigger. Wearing a shirt open with a vest is also a good look. Find jeans very uncomfy always hitching them up even when wearing a belt.

I agree nice haircut, dye/highlight, make up, bag and shoes all make me feel better. When i get depressed about my mummy tummy.

Spirit - Thanks for the advice, I'd love some dresses but not sure how they would work whilst bfeeding, I have visions of somehow managing to completely expose myself!

Cyb - I ill def be looking for a funky coat this winter, I saw a lovely one last winter but couldn't justify the expense because I was pg and wouldn't get the use out of it.

I'm sorted on the hair/make up front. I always do my make up before going out, only a natural look but it makes a massive difference to how I feel and have been and had my hair done and now its shorter I can quickly make it look decent rather than my longer style that look ages to wash, dry and style. Just need the clothes to match now!

Its so annoying because I have some lovely clothes but I can't get in them, grrrr!

miche - love the sling idea!

I was utterly shameless whilst bf (or too knackered to care ) but most mums I know go for the artfully draped cheap 'pashmina' to hide any fleshy bits. And I tend to wear a vest top under my wrap dresses/tops anyway to avoid nork spillage. I've just done a quick test (yes, I really am wearing one of the said dresses) and all you'd need to do is pull the wrap part of the dress to the side and pull up the vest top - the dress still covers your tummy so if anything it's more discreet.

wrap round dress! flattering on big boobies and mummy tummies, easy to wear, comfy and great for breastfeeding :-)

Right, will have to investigate wrap dresses then! Thanks!

If you're not sure about a dress while bfing, welovefrugi.com do tops and dresses suitable for maternity and bfing (I have two of the tops and love them - also can be thrown in washer/dryer and because double-layered nice and warm). The design is such that tum is covered while bfing as well, which I like as DC2 due in December and I don't want to get cold! Just wish they did more colours.

Hello, if you're still around I saw this today in Laura Ashley (of all places) - style is Toast rip-off at a fraction of the price and ideal for bf!

here

spirit - thanks, that looks great. i just need to hit town and try things on now!