Craving has come back

[chloem93]

I've been smoke free since last February, so basically a year. I gave up proper fags before I found out I was pregnant and I was doing the e cig to ween myself off by lowering my nicotine dose. It worked and I eventually didn't need the e cig anymore but now a year has passed, I've had my daughter who's just over 2 months old and the craving has returned. I walk by a shop that sells fags and I think 'aww it would be nice to have a puff right now.' I have added stress so possible this is why, I'm a single parent with no help and currently living in temporary accommodation (a hostel). I have noisy neighbours who keep me up late and wake me up early in the morning, I haven't had any daytime naps like other mums can do because of the noise. I don't have any friends in this area and most days I'm alone with my daughter and the only conversation I have is baby talk. I'm limited to when I can go out as public transport is terrible around here and I don't drive, the closest shop is 3 miles away so in my opinion, there's not much around and it's more countryside than I'm use to. My mum has also just found out she has breast cancer, she's my only support and who I phone often so the thought of losing her does stress me out. I admit that I've been buying a bottle of wine more often recently (I drink responsibly of course) but I find I need something else to relieve my stress, I'm always feeling up tight and can't relax.
Yes I probably sound like a right moaner but all of these things together is making me tempted to start smoking again! I know I'll be disappointed with myself if I do and it's not exactly the right time to start again, I live on the second floor and would have to carry my daughter down stairs whenever I want a smoke, plus I don't want to smoke around her and be a bad influence as I am her only consistent role model. Also the increased risk of SIDS freak me out.
I have also been wondering if I should start vaping again, to stop me from turning to proper smoking? Does any one think this is a good idea and if so, should I just stick to zero nicotine liquid or go to the lowest level so I'd get some nicotine? Obviously I don't want to get addicted again (I use to smoke 40+ a day). On top of that, I can't afford to smoke, I want to start driving soon so I'll have those added expenses :/ but it's a positive thing I can do as being limited to where I can go and not having freedom of movement, is driving me insane.

Any advice for me or if you've had this problem of cravings after pregnancy so you can relate, be nice to know what you've done to fight them? Thanks :)

Hi OP I just wanted to give a message of support I have a 3 month old son and am a ex smoker ( also got clean by vaping ) I haven’t touch wood started craving it again but

1. it’s been 4 years so I have had moments but nothing as long standing / I over eat so guess that’s my new habit / addiction
2. being a first time mum is stressful but I have support what your going through is awful with your mum and so Much harder being a single Mum

If you were not addicted to vape then maybe a few different flavours of zero nicotine would be good to help but I would do it around you bubba as we still don’t know enough about the effects of vaping.

Is there no baby groups at all do you live in a village? Maybe there is something on that you can walk to ? Sounds like you are starved of support

What about friends? You need support now as you are all busy being strong for your mum and daughter you need someone even a couple of good friends to be strong for you, talk to them about what’s going on try and get them over once a month to share a a drink and unwind have adult talk / listen to heir problems to take your mind off your own.

I am so sorry you are going through this , only
Positive is the word cancer does not automatically mean death it’s amazing what they can do my grandad survived 3 different cancers old age and pneumonia got him in the end so have that cancer

My husbands uncle has just got over cancer too... there are so many success stories ... I hope your mum is
One of them x x

Middlrm,

Thank you for the kind words! I'm sorry to hear about your grandad and glad cancer didn't get him in the end!

I have been offered by a children's centre to go to a baby massage group and a play class every Friday, I haven't been to them yet as my leg was playing up big time so I wanted to wait until I was in better health but I am planning on going to these classes. I am shy when I meet people so that doesn't help, guess you could say 'socially awkward', I find it hard to initiate a conversation and carry it on. I had this problem in Pregnancy club so I went once and didn't go again but I will really try this time and hopefully there will be someone I can click with.

Unfortunately I don't have any friends, not in this area anyway. The lack of female friends is probably what makes it tougher, there's no one I could go out with if I ever could get someone to watch my daughter because let's face it, all of us need a break sometime. I would have no one to meet up with :/ I have started to talk to a girl in the hostel where I live and she is nice, she's even offered to look after my child if I need a break which is a really generous offer.

Wouldn't say I was addicted to the vape but I became pregnant and then after a few weeks I felt like I had to quit as I was pregnant so I had that motivation, now if I started the vape again I wouldn't have that motivation to stop but I think of it this way, it's better than tar fags. The girl in my hostel said I could even do the vape in my room as it won't set off the fire alarm (she does it in her room) so there's that upside. But yes I see your point about there not being enough information on e cigs, I guess I'm looking for the lesser of two evils in a way. I don't want to be smelling of fags again, can really smell it once you quit and it smells rank!

My mum is optimistic, I believe they caught it early so fingers crossed she will be ok! My Nan passed away from cancer so it runs in my family, my Nan beat cancer once but then it returned.

I think the added stress of living where I'm living plus the lack of sleep grinds me down. I did have money problems last month to the point that I had to go to a food bank, thankfully I shouldn't need it this month. As long as my daughter has what she needs though, that gives me a little bit of relief.

Can't blame you for enjoying food, it's a pleasure of life. It's a way I relax in the evening, dinner and a glass of wine has recently been the only time I get to myself.

And well done you for being smoke free for 4 years. I hope that once I've moved from here and things get settled and my mum is better, the craving will go xx

Hi op ... how are you doing? And how is your mum? Thinking of you

dcmg sorry for late reply and thank you for your kind words ... my story I am sure is much like many others... quitting smoking was one of the hardest things I have done and if I can help someone absolutely, the first time I quit was after serving someone with throat cancer who was terminal and still smoked heavily his scars just gave me nightmares ... I did go back after 10
Months ( after just having one ... worst mistake ) and built up the courage to quit a year later ... the financial side also encouraged me plus finding out my nan has bad heart from years of smoking, vape was how I quit and got my mum on to this too and she hasn’t smoked in just under 4 years ... she still vapes but I never saw it as a long term plan just an aid... and slowly weaned myself off it... a change of job helped me stop in the working day as the mental triggers were not there and then a severe hangover got me off the low stuff ... not the best way to figure out your only
Mentally not physically addicted as was practically having no nicotine ... I have occasionally if our drinking borrowed a friends vape but it was more the popcorn flavour aspect that appealed ( I get hungry when drinking ) now I have a baby no risk of that 😂😂 if I hadn’t quit there is no way I would have been able to afford he house wedding and baby I now have so I am so glad I did quit it as so much positives have come from it ... that and my risk of heart attack and other issues are reducing all the time .

I used to be on 40 a day I now vape zero nicotine I did it with one of these it cost me about £20 and was the best thing I ever did.
I think I will always vape now but it's better than the cigs.