You're absolutely welcome, I am glad I can help in anyway. I totally, totally get where you are coming from.
I'm not going to lie, the first few weeks/months were what I can only describe as like a rollercoaster.
I made the decision once and for all to quit smoking after so many disastrous attempts. We were house hunting and found the house of our dreams. The problem was, it was at the top end of our budget and my DH said that he didn't want to stretch ourselves to the point we would be copper ing up every week. I was heartbroken but sat down and did some sums and was shocked to realise that if I gave up smoking, it would make a massive impact to our budget and we could buy the house without being so overstretched. ( we lived in NZ and the prices of cigarettes were hair raising) so the decision was made and the motivation was there.
I went from feeling giddy with excitement that I was going to do this, finally, once and for all...to feeling lost, like I was grieving something important in my life,, if that makes sense? But I kept reminding myself over and over again of the positives and wrote down a list of positive things to focus on - not just the obvious things like health, money but little things like being able to go somewhere and not constantly feel panicked if I was in a non smoking place or with non smoking friends. There were days in the early days that were totally shit.. I remember my DH coming home from work to find me crying like a baby on the bed because I had put a shit loads of weight on and couldn't fit into anything. (I wasn't paying attention to my diet/weight) I was also quite snappy too. However, I decided that I had come that far (however many weeks) and I am not going to cave in and have to start from scratch again. I had full support from my family, particular my youngest DS who was amazing.
I would 100% recommend joining a quit smoking forum as the support on those forums are brilliant. There were posters on there who were fantastic, everyone cheering everyone on and helping each other.
As I say that was all back in 2009, and for many years, I have not even thought about cigarettes. I still congratulate myself on how well I have done as it is honestly the toughest thing to kick to the curb if you are well and truly addicted as I was.