Needing a little hope

[HLouise94]

My beautiful baby girl was born sleeping just over a week ago at 37 weeks. We are truly heartbroken and devastated by this, particularly because it seems to have been caused by a tragic accident with the umbilical cord. I know it’s early, but I feel like the only way I will begin to heal from this is if I become pregnant again. Has anybody been in a similar situation and gone on to conceive again quite quickly?

I am so sorry for the loss of your darling baby girl ❤️ I have no experience of this but just wanted to send my condolences 💐
im sure people who have been through this will come along and be able to help you navigate this traumatic time ❤️

Thank you ❤️

Sending you love and strength. Would you like to tell us your beautiful daughter’s name?

Try to give yourself time, your body has been through such a hard time and it’s difficult to remember that you need time to heal after pregnancy and birth when you have the heartache of having to come home without your baby. Tommys have a helpline if you need to talk 0800 0147 800 xxx

Her name is Niamh Louise. She is simply perfect. It’s such a difficult thing for us to get our head around 😞

Sending you huge hugs. I've been in a similar place, I lost my little girl at 26 weeks. It's 7 years later now and I still grieve for her, and milestones are hard but it does ease.
I went on to have another little girl and she knows all about her big sister, it was important for me to keep her memory alive.
Sending you all the hugs, take each day at a time xx

Thank you so much for sharing your experience 💐

Oh and in answer to your question... we had 2.5 years of fertility treatment to have our first little girl. 6 weeks after she died I naturally conceived- it felt like a bit of a miracle to be honest.

My friend lost her little girl some years ago at a similar stage. There has never been an answer why she died. It's devastating. I think most women do have a strong urge to get pregnant again quickly but it's a good idea to give yourself just a few months. Your body needs the break and there are two parents grieving, you just both need a bit of time to adjust and to feel ready together to try.
Niamh is such a beautiful name. You made a good choice.

I’m so glad that your story had a happy ending. It’s nice to hear some positivity ❤️

stillbirthstories.org/

This may be helpful OP, it's made up of clinicians and families sharing their stories. You are not alone.

What a beautiful name for your daughter 💕x

I'm so sorry this has happened to you. I lost my first son at 34+3 back in 2010. I have since gone on to have 4 more children. It does get easier with time x

Thank you ❤️ Can I ask if you ever found out why your son passed away?

I have no experience of this but just wanted to acknowledge your darling Niamh and to send you some love OP ❤️

Yes, he had iugr caused by problems with the placenta. They picked up the problem at the 20 week scan so we knew from then that it was possible that we would lose him but we never gave up on him.

Firstly can I say how sorry I am that you are going through this. Its devastating. My heart goes out to you.

In answer to your question, my first born son passed away an hour after he was born 25 years ago. I was very poorly and almost lost my own life. But I also felt that urge to have another baby. It was a huge urge to fill the massive void that my beautiful little boy had left. I medically had to wait until I was given the all clear with my health, and for me to record normal liver function results, which took 3 months. But then I was told we could try again if we wish. My ex and I talked it through and decided we would not use protection and let fate decide. As luck would have it we got pregnant immediately and my DD was born the following year. She is now 24.

I understand the urge but would advise that you allow yourself to grieve for the child you have lost. Spend the time making albums and putting together memories and a memory box. I promise you these will be treasured precious possession and something you will keep forever to always remind you of your daughter and the huge mark she has made on your life.

But I am proof that another baby can be conceived fairly quickly. I always say that my baby boy broke my heart, my eldest daughter fixed me, and my youngest daughter completed me.

I’m so sorry you lost your beautiful Niamh. I lost a gorgeous girl almost 20 years ago. I went on to have two more children.
I’m so very sorry x

Hello. I’m so sorry for your loss.

My husband and I lost our beautiful twin boys on Boxing Day 2025. We do not know why they came early (22 weeks). Our first born, Henry, was alive for 45 minutes before passing in my arms and his brother, Rupert, died during the delivery.

Have you conceived at all since your loss because I feel exactly the same as you right now! I miss our beautiful boys every day. We have lost 3 babies and are so desperate for a family. We will not give up hope!