Aibu?
Been together 6 years, live in seperate houses mainly because he has a 4 bed house but won’t have his children share who visit maybe every other weekend these days. My two children can’t share due to my youngest a disability. His mother owes them house and she is apparently told old to sell this house and get a bigger one, told us when she’s dead then we can do what we want but she doesn’t want to. Also financially I would actually be skint living with him.
Anyways his kids are now 12 and 14. They come roughly every other weekend now when I have my kids rather than every weekend. Which I am happier about as means that we get the every other weekend without my children and his and can just relax and chill like we use to when we first got together as he use to have his kids Sundays and Mondays every week but that changed to every Friday and saturday. Unfortunately I will still book my weekends away on my child free weekends and it’s upto him whether he stays at home with his kids or comes with me and he choose to come with me. So I think naturally they now come every other week. But this is now my dilemma. His kids will stay awake a lot durn the night (says he can’t control this because their mother allows it.) and then they sleep u til like 1-2pm. My every other weekend with my children we have to to be quiet until 1-2. Usually I have a lie in Saturdays so they are happy in the room they have to share the 2 nights we are here but then I get up and we don’t do breakfast or lunch until they are up, we just sit and watch tv, play iPads and do nothing with our day or go out and do nothing fun because we wait for them to get up and then they don’t even want to go out. I then get grumpy and in a mood because I’m like this is just boring, he believes it’s doing my kids good as believes over the years they have been too spoilt with weekend to zoos and theme parks etc as his kids didn’t and holidays abroad etc. but I’m bored at home, I also don’t want my eldest wanting to live with his dad because we do nothing. Today I have made plans as he went to work at 7am and his kids let themselves out when they wake up and that’s wrong because I am treating my kids to a day out, well yes unfortunately I am because I have to do something with them! But we can’t make any noise and wake his precious children. I’d i stay at home the weekend we get moaned at that we aren’t spending time together as a family.
I take my kids abroad most years, his kids don’t have passports and that’s a him problem I can’t be expected to pay for them aswell as me and my kids. But I am putting £30 a week into an account same as him to do weekends away in this country with all our children! That’s great but we have done one and have another booked and one of his kids is saying she may not come as it’s too childish. We go to like park deans. But she had a blast last time, and we’ve said we are open to ideas to suit everyone. Anyways he doesn’t really like to go spending on them park days etc but has said this time we can take food to cook and use the money to d a theme park or something to make her want to keep coming. Sorry but she’s just being ungrateful on my eyes. Her mother doesn’t take her away we are trying to do something every other month and it’s not good enough. But he just tells me I am making them the enemy and I’m being harsh. Like err no. She’s being ungrateful.
Now refusing to eat dinner if I cook it, although it’s cooked the exact way he does it.
All his kids did was spend all weekend upstairs anyways! Like what’s the point in coming over? The youngest was because she wanted her friend over Friday night which disturbs everyone as they can’t be quiet. But he thinks it’s great because the friend is allowed to stay here and not the mothers and that he could win the battle with her wanting to move on here.
I get staying home is great we save money but I’m bored of it. Step