Wicked step-mother

[likeasongbird]

My DS is 9, with his father every 2nd weekend.
DS's dad has recently reunited with his long-term partner after 'moving on' his girlfriend of 12 months.

DS has in the past told me about long-term partner being heavy handed with him. 'Scrubbing him hard' in the bath, pushing him into a sink to wash his hands with the tap on full blast. That sort of thing.

DS's school had visit from NSPCC this week which prompted him to tell me about long-term partner shutting a cupboard door on his face. His face is grazed. I raised this with his dad who defended his partner and came up with an alternative explanation, said DS had got into habit of making things up. As things turn out, DS's half-sister witnessed the incident and it appears long-term partner did cause the injury.

Very concerned DS's dad would try and cover his partner's tracks, above his son's welfare. If it was an accident why not just say so.
Don't know what to do now. Call NSPCC for advice? School? I don't want to press the nuclear button but I can't sit by/not do anything either.

It is a police matter OP, she assaulted your son. You know you need to call them.

He needs to stay home until she’s gone back to wherever she came from

tell H that if he causes trouble, you’ll report her assault to the police.

And she’s not just wicked, she’s abusive

Your poor son, so little and should be being cared for not assaulted.
His dad needs to accept responsibility for ds’s safety and wellbeing and his partner needs to consider her actions and take control to ensure she does not assault a child again.
I would not want my ds being around her even if his dad is there as dad is not facing up to the truth.
I would speak to NSPCC for advice but ultimately your child needs protection from this treatment of him.

Bloody hell Op, I’d be speaking to school, NSPCC and also the police. His dad can’t be trusted to keep him safe so you need to be the one to protect him. Poor child. Hope he’s ok.

OP, a police matter.
Do not allow your son near her again until this is resolved.
Log it with101.
Any guff tell him to go to court.
His girlfriend hurt your son.
It was witnessed.
Protect your child.

Nailed it. Refuse contact and let him take you to court. In the mean time, speak to social services, 101 (it'll be reported to social I think anyway and they're good to have on your side). Get as much evidence as you can, speak to the safeguarding lead at school, ask for help. Explain you want some help with if this gets taken to court, as the court order can state she's not allowed to be there so it's important. Though I wouldn't want him having your son alone either at his home as he seems to be a spineless cunt too. But he could get supervised visits.

So many children have been harmed or murdered by their step parent it isn't worth the risk. I'm sure you're aware so I'm not trying to make you feel any worse.

This.

If you ask nspcc for advice and there are marks and it has been witnessed then they will want it reported to social services and you will be right to keep him away from there and they will support that decision whilst enquiries are made by the relevant people. Protect your son

Not acceptable. It's not appropriate for her to bath him let alone scrubbing him, if he needs help with bathing because of SEN it should be his Dad and it should be gentle but you don't mention SEN so nobody should be bathing him, she shouldn't be pushing him into sinks (leading him to a sink and telling him to wash his hands I could understand but not being pushed into a sink), the cupboard thing is awful too. I would report to SS and not let my child there again.

Thank you all. Steps have been taken.

Very well done to your little one for speaking out and to you for taking action. He needs you to protect him - children are so vulnerable and often they are not listened to. This is not something to be swept under the carpet like his father thinks. Safe guarding training tells of so many children who have been let down by people who know of abuse and ignore it.

Sending a massive hug and wishing you all the best.

That’s what happens when a father delegates child-rearing responsibilities to an unwilling girlfriend. You DC is NOBODY to that woman, yet, she is made to look after him every other weekend. It is very rarely that the woman opens her heart to step-child.
Your ex ‘looks after’ your DC eow, yet, his partner is made to cook and bathe your DC!
OP, you MUST protect your baby! Don’t delay, report the abuse to the police, social services and ask for supervised visits only, if he can not protect your child while he is with him.