Holidays

[Jojojosie1708]

So we have a spends time with order for my other half’s kids and we want to go on holiday. The bio mum said no to the kids coming but says if we go then we are in contempt of the court order as not available to see the kids. Anyone know if that’s right? I can’t see how we can never have a holiday without her permission even when not taking the kids.

She’s being a bitch. Get a specific issue order so that you can take the kids on holiday with you.

In terms of a holiday without kids, you’ll have to do this around what is outlined in the Order.

so we have the order that says they can come but she refused when we were booking and too late to add them to the holiday so when it went to court it’s actually written in the order that we are going on this holiday without the kids but she’s saying it doesn’t say she has to have them while we are away so we are in contempt. Honestly it’s such a mess. Never thought it would be this difficult. Me and my son’s dad have a fantastic co parenting relationship. In fact he is away this week with his girlfriend and not seeing our son and I have zero issues with that and when I go away he has zero issues. Wish kids weren’t weapons

I think it sounds clear that the expectation is that the DC will be with their mum whilst you’re away given that she’s deprived them of the opportunity to enjoy the holiday with you. She can restore the matter to Court if she wants to look like an absolute fool!

So if we just go on holiday and she takes it back to court they won’t put the other half in prison for contempt then?

Poor kids missing out because of bitterness .
Not good

No. That isnt how those orders work, generally. It depends on the wording to an extent but a parent cant be forced to actually take their assigned parenting time.

It can how ever be used to support a change in custody and visitation if a non resident parent chooses not to actually take up their assigned parenting time.

Thats great for you, personally I absolutely expected my ex to plan his holidays with his partner not during his parenting time expecting me pick up his slack. Same curtesy I gave him.

How ever if the holiday was planned for your partners parenting time and was booked to include his kids and she is stopping them come thats on her. Did any of the holiday time frame include her parenting time?

yes as he has them weekly 3 days one week and 4 days the next. So any holiday would always be when he or she would have planned parent time.

When we saw the solicitor the solicitor said that we were entitled to holidays etc and prior to the whole mess the bio mum was aware the holiday was booked and aware she was having the kids and the holiday was booked with the already agreement she was having them. The solicitor had it written in the recitals that we were going away on them dates and not available for the spends time with order.

This literally started again last week and we are due to go away in November so couldn’t even get it back to court in time.

I know. It’s not even like we have ever stopped her and her partner either. They went away without the kids in August and we had them for two weeks.

Ye do wonder what goes trough people head. It's the kids loosing out at the end of the day

Yep defo not easy situation.

It sounds like you did your best. You've been really clear about the arrangements and she's had a lot of notice.

IANAL but I can't imagine the court would be impressed with her behaviour. They tend not to be interested in trivialities. Your partner would not be sent to prison over this.

Thank you. We didn’t want to have to go back to court and pay solicitors all again. We have actually gone back to the solicitor thou who confirmed the wording etc on the court order is sufficient with regards to this holiday however we need to maybe submit a change to clearly state she has to have the children if they are not coming with us on holiday as she is clearly not going to accept the current wording which actually states along the lines of if he is not available he is to provide 4 weeks notice apart from an emergency. Solicitor is going to add if he is not available then 4 weeks notice is to be provided and children remain in mothers care. And same for her if she wishes to go away without the kids

I would 100% instruct my solicitor to defend an amendment like your solicitor has proposed.

I absolutely would not accept me being default child care for my ex because he said it to me 4 weeks in advance unless in an emergency. Of by mutual agreement.

His parenting time. His to sort out.

That wording is far to broad and I wouldn't be signing myself up to anything like it. And if DH told me he had intended to try that SS mother I d have told him if I was her I wouldn't agree to it either.

He has the kids for her to go on holiday to so where is that fair? She gets to go on holiday and the kids are in his care but he can’t?

He needs her permission to take the kids on holiday as he is spends time with parent. She has refused and he isn’t allowed to leave the children in the care of anyone else so therefore he can never have a holiday?

Sorry but it’s very unfair. She is the lives with parent so therefore has to be fair just like he is fair.

what a shame she is being so difficult. Poor kids missing out on a break because of petty behaviour. sad.