Hello, I've decided to keep this short as I felt my first attempt trying to write something was too long and dragging. I am a pregnant mum with several young children- as well as an older stepchild in my home. I can't help but feel invisible, judged, and alone while I face issues with my stepchild. He tries to fight me every step of the way even though I try to get along and work through issues. I spend a lot of time feeling as if my negative interactions with him get downplayed by others, like today for example- context: my stepchild gets possessive over any toy in our home and becomes toy aggressive. He believes he can play with my toddlers toys but will meltdown himself if they look at his toys from across the room or if they find a toy he hasn't touched in years and are playing with it. He expects them to share but wont share. I told him if he can't share anything to not play with my kids toys as its not fair to ice them out while he gets to play with their things too. Stepchild also has the most toys in the house, mountains in comparison to my kids- and people give him toys all the time. Its hard for me to get my kids toys as much as I'd like but I also feel like any rare treat I'm able to get for them disappears or gets destroyed by stepchild if I'm not careful to keep an extra eye on an incoming belonging. Stepchild already doesn't like to listen to me but I put my foot down and asked him to go to his room since he kept making faces/balling his fist when my kids would look at a toy of his or would be teasing my kids while he'd play with their things. He doesn't like being stood up to but I never let him treat my kids how he feels like it and I know he resents me for it, since a lot of people in his life let him do what he wants. He said he wasn't going so I told him to call his dad on his cell and tell him how he was acting and because he needed to cool down. He gets embarrassed having to do that because I know he doesn't like people knowing how he treats others. He decided to start screaming, throwing things and kicking furniture and went after me trying to kick/hit me saying how he hated me and how I was a “big, dumb b”. I tried to remove him from the living room asap as he was scaring my kids and grabbed his hand, making him go to his room while I tried getting his dad on the phone. Got scratched but got him to his room. His dad came from work and took him to a relatives for the night, it was nice to feel seen for once instead of accused of starting problems because stepchild always tries to make me vs him situations and point the finger at me that I was “bothering him too much to behave himself”. His relative downplayed it saying he probably just took it out on me because school started but even before today he'd try to find an excuse to get into an altercation with me so he could watch his dad chew me out thinking I started it or would get angry when I'd remind him right from wrong. Spouse’s family always jumps to conclusions too when stuff like this happens, but I don’t think I'm wrong for standing up for my kids and standing up to him and acting like a parent should even though he's not my own. I feel iced out from his family because of that, hence the feelings of feeling invisible, judged.. the list goes on. And honestly I've tried so much over the years to try to see eye to eye with stepchild and try to give him opportunities to have me ask less of him since it bothers not only him, but his dad and his family since they think I ask him to behave himself too often. Ive tried to ask less and give him even more space but I feel like its not enough for him and he keeps at it. It makes me question if things will ever improve.