Me and my bf have been together 5.5 years and we have a great relationship, but our arguments are only ever related to his kids (not so much anymore) and his ex wife. She has always, in my opinion, crossed boundaries by calling to talk about her feelings. Yes, they are initially child related but often the call leads with her crying and my bf feeling sorry for her. She is not a great mum IMO and causes a lot of the 2 daughters problems. My bf always says he blames her behaviour for their issues and how the calls are annoying etc, but I worry he is enabling it. Why would she continue to call, cry and winge over the smallest of problems, if he isn't giving her what she is after. She is married and in a secure relationship. When my bf has said that she should probably go to her husband about the issues related to being in their household solely, she apparently replies and said they do not intervene with each others kids. (He has 4 of his own) I have expressed my concern to my bf that he is enabling and shouldn't feel the need to answer the phone if it is not an emergency etc. Both daughters are older 14 and 16 and have open communication with him. I feel he may be saying one thing to her and another to me. Do I look at his messages to get to see if he is lying to me or just leave them to it?