Hi,
I am a bit anxious to post this but I need some advice.
I am currently going through a divorce. I was with my ex husband for 10 years. I have a daughter from my previous relationship. She was 5 when we met.
Recently my daughter (who is now 16) has told me that my ex has made her feel extremely uncomfortable and some of his behaviour has been extremely inappropriate. This is what she shared with me….
would make incredibly uncomfortable and it happened so many times can’t remember it all . Like how on the way back home from my dads house he would vent to me about how mum wastes money on getting her hair and nails done but when he was face to face with mum he would say he would never begrudge her having anything . He also make comments about my body that started as my body developed into a woman . He would talk about how big my breast have gotten and compare me to my friends who were less developed and say how I had a more grown up body . Because I am blind I have always needed help with shaving my armpits and legs and my mum would normally help me but one day offered to help and because I was desperate I said yes . Then after that it got worse he would jump at tue chance to help me shave and as he was shaving my armpits he would touch my boob as if it was in the way and he needed to move it . He would smirk at me whilst doing this. I started to notice when he would hug me how his hands would be near my bum and how he would squeeze me and the reason I never spoke out about was because I didn’t know if it was normal for a stepfather to act that way he would also make comments in the car and at home about how close we were . Also just before him and mum separated he would touch my thigh in the car but only when he was talking to me . Sometimes he would make the comments in front of mum and she would shut it down straight away but I started to feel unsafe and he also made comments about how he couldn’t do inappropriate things to me with mum in the room.
Just to add at my twin brother and sister’s birthday party he also made comments about my cousin who at the time was only 11 I believe and he was talking about how she need to let her boobs grow more before wearing a tube top .
I am sorry if spelling is bad . But at the end it f the day I don’t feel comfortable or safe around that man . What gave him the right to talk about MY body A MINORS body that way .
This is her own words.
I contacted 101 and the police now want to interview her which she’s okay about.
I feel utterly terrible that she’s been put in this position. As her mum I should have not allowed him to help with her self care. She’s registered blind and relies on others for help.
She no longer sees or has any contact with him but what I’m struggling with is what would be reasonable steps following the police interview? I have 9 year old twins with him (boy/girl) and am unsure how to proceed with contact etc.
I don’t need any judgement and appreciate any advice.