Disney dad with step kids

[Mummyriver]

Bit of a long one however ive been in a relationship til recently with a guy for 6 years
he has 2 children from previous relationship and we have a 5 month old together

the issue is the whole disney dad
the kids are lazy he runs around after them doing literally everything eow when they are here
they moved into my house so everything here was things i bought and they treat it like a doss house
stand on furniture get things all over it like food drinks make up
never tidy up after the selves
leave the bathroom a mess

they dont really speak to me i get one word answers, they will play a game and ask dad to play but leave me sat there not included
ask if he wants to do this or that

i could literally be making a drink that they want but they wont ask me they would go find him to ask
it like im invisible in my own home and uncomfortable being there

the issue is ive addressed the problems with my ex oh but he refuses to acknowledge it say there kids yet there 10 & 13
He says am always getting at them which has driven our relationship apart to the point were no longer together which i feel awful for our baby.
has anyone been in a similar situation and give any ideas on how to try and sort this

its like they come first even before our own baby as well and nothing else matters but them when they are here and he refuses to address issue with them and would rather throw the relationship away then see my points and back me up with a simple chat about some ground rules

He’s your ex now, keep it that way. If he didn’t change things before you added a sibling he isn’t going to know. while his parenting sounds shit, it’s literally the worst possible time for him to make significant changes, if he starts getting strict now, right after he had another child, where do you think his dc will put the blame?

the time for this was before a new sibling came along.

They're not your problem any more and hopefully they're now out of your house. Your ex has no respect for you so it's definitely best that you decided to split. Probably wasn't the best idea to have a child with someone who doesn't respect you and isn't a great parent but the baby is here now. Hopefully he can be present for his youngest child but sadly you don't have much control over how he parents them.

It's better that your child is brought up in a stable home with a happy mum rather than have to witness their mother being treated like shit by some man and his feral kids.

Unfortunately alot of these dad's are Disney dads, they are ascared to lay down rules or tell kids of or say no in fear the kids won't want to come and stay no more, this will never get better, stay the ex for your own sake, thr kids will only get worse as they get older to.

What are the plans for him moving out now that you've split? Can you afford it on your own?

As others have said if he refused to parent his kids before then I doubt he suddenly will, unless he has the desire to do so.

If it's your house why are he and the kids still there?

This will be hard. Make sure you have a good support system around you. You'll get through it x

He had his own place to go back too luckily, and thankfully i can afford my house on my own.

i asked him the other day when he came to see the baby if his 2 had asked why they wasnt coming to mine any more or did they ask about the baby to be told no they didnt

its seems even more so we was the inconvenience to them and their previous set up and we were never going to be welcomed into the fold especially by them -children or not i tried my hardest with them unfortunately they didnt seem to to be bothered by that