They’re not your kids …

[Arewealljustloosingtheplot]

‘They’re not you kids so why do you care’

direct quote from husband when I was in trouble for being ‘too aggressive’ in a convo about where to go to college. They are super clever but lazy and I feel are selling themselves short.

funnily enough, I’m allowed to care when it comes to doing their washing and paying for the food shopping and whatnot.

not looking for advice, some solidarity would be nice ( the -‘ you knew he had kids’ brigade can sod off- this isn’t the place for you)

I would of just said ‘yeh you are right and il remember that when you want me to do something for them’

Prick.

Thanks everyone.

he also doesn’t agree with the choice, but he thinks his softly softly will work. It never does.
i did not call them lazy, I just said that i felt like they were not pushing themselves for the best outcome.

i wont bother in future and next time he tries this with mine ( which he does MUCH more frequently) I’ll remind him he isn’t worthy of an opinion.

Not a step-parent but from reading here the majority of step parents do seem to get a rough deal.
It seems that the actual parent expect them to do all the mundane jobs that come with having children but then expect them to butt out when they dare voice an opinion.
I think your DP is being an arse.
Yes there will be shit step parents out there but there are shit parents also

So he's a rude prick and you are a mug.

You deserve better OP, so do your children.

Nicest non-SM post ever on this board! 🌹

You can't win. I hear you

However, protecting myself and my sanity and knowing OH has got this - as it's his son I've been adopting the NACHO method of step-parenting , which has been a lifesaver

What an absolute arse he is to say that, OP, especially as he feels free to give advice to/about your children.i agree with everyone else saying step back - drop a few balls and let him pick them up. 🦋

I had the whole ‘why do you care they’re not even your children’ thrown at me by my ex partner when the police caught one of his kids dealing drugs and bringing them into the house! Safe to say he’s an ex now but it’s funny how they think it’s alright to care when you’re doing the daily shit for them (cleaning up after them, clothes washing, food shopping etc).

Just quick props to this statement. It's unbelievably hard (can't imagine it's easy for kids either to be honest). But no, it's not easy and 99% of the time no one understands, especially if you have no bio kids too.