Hi.
my teenage step daughter (17) has been living with me hubby and two other kids for about 7ish years. Her attitude towards me has gotten worse and worse as time goes on. Now she’s currently not staying with us refused to come home from visiting her mum recently it’s been about a month. It seems everyone is playing off against each other but it all falls back on to me and being my fault. I’ve constantly chased school, college, trips, activities everything I’ve done so much for her. Provided meals she threw it back in my face. She’s got her own room she let it get so disgusting I gutted it out and that was wrong. She’s adamant I called her something nasty when she went to prom. I did not. I don’t have time for things like that.
ive been accused of body shaming her because her dad told her not to wear a crop top, saying horrible things about her to her face and other people then saying actually it was someone else who said that but still blaming me. She blamed me for breaking her relationship with her boyfriend up when her and my mother in law were trying to break me and my husband up. I’ve tried to understand her to the point my other children including one who has additional needs has been completely tossed aside so I can try and sort out her problems.
last night I found out she’s been saying she won’t come back with me here. I’m broken seriously I’ve spent so much time, energy on trying to help her I get told my other daughter is treated like a saint gets away with everything and shouldn’t be allowed to use her phone whenever she wants to but in my defense my other daughter hasn’t done anything wrong and my step daughter was constantly sexting and sending photos promising to do thing with boys and I swear to you if my other daughter does something wrong oh boy she gets told. I’ve taken her phone away more times then she’s actually had the thing lol. But I get told she gets away with everything. That’s just normal for parent and child basics. The kid does wrong I tell them off and work through it.
Maybe I’m a stricter then other parents but I want to bring up independent, focused young women who know how to behave. she’s saying that she wants to go back to days when it was just her and her dad before me and my kids (who are also her dads kids) came along. I don’t think it’s fair neither does he to spend a whole weekend with one of them or only takes her out to Mac Donald’s or treats her to clothes and buys stuff and not the other two coz then he’s gotta do it for the other two it’ll be a three weekend cycle it’ll be never ending and we’ve always done stuff together.
I guess I’m just ranting. I literally decided Last night I can’t do it anymore. She’s constantly lying about stuff. I can’t spend all my time, energy on her. My other kids are missing out I never get anywhere with her. But then I don’t know if that will work. Has anyone else got kids with someone but isn’t involved with the step child? I’ve really really had enough.
ive got other things going on in life my dad is sick and my mum passed away last year I’m broken that I don’t have parents I can rant to. There’s just some days when you need your mum and dad. I trust none anymore my husbands family have been against me for a long time but why can’t I just be married to my husband without all them sticking their noses in. I married him not his mum, dad and stepmom. I love him and I’m so happy with us and our lifestyle our way of living. He’s even said since she’s not been staying here he feels like he can relax abit more.
sorry for the essay. I’m terrible at writing so excuse the badly written rants essay. I think I needed to offload.