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Step-parenting

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Staying out of it?

3 replies

Justwannadotherightthing · 22/06/2023 13:45

I dont know what to do. So my partner has 3 kids, i have two. We have been together two years and the kida in each others lives about a year. Hes amazing with my kids both boys, but struggles with his own. They stay with us every weekend and its becoming very apparent that he didnt really play mich of a part in his childrens lives before. I dont know what went on in his marriage and i suspect that if i spoke to her id get a very different story than what he would say.

He doeant seem to have any connection with tje kids. When they come to us i hear everything that they have done all week... They dont tell him anything but nor does he ask. Apparently two of them had behavioural problems for quite a few years and in his words hard to handle. I dont see this at all. What i do see is a lack of patience and connection.

Anyway.... The koda have improved dramatically over the past year. He says its because they are woth is more, she says the improvement is theor dad being out of the house. Shes now not tellong him stuff about the kods, important things re school etc and hes doing his nut saying shes out to get him and giving off stink about her parenting skills over the years.

I can see her point of view about a lot of things. But dare i say it.?. i dont wanna be involved, but i can see that there is a tag of war going on aboout who is the best parent.... And the kods are gonna suffer. They already have. What do others do?

OP posts:
Buyyouflowers · 22/06/2023 14:01

Stay out of it.

Raindropsarefallingheavily · 22/06/2023 14:08

All you can do is encourage him to make the effort. But ultimately it is up to him. Ime it is difficult being away from a big chunk of your dc's lives. It is genuinely hard to reconnect after dc have been at the other dp's home.
Again ime.

billy1966 · 22/06/2023 17:25

Stay out of it.

But I would be very very wary of being with such a man.

He has clearly neglected his children badly, but now enjoys yours🙄.

He's a shit father and that says so much to his character.

Protect your children from someone who has already let his own children down badly.

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