I get jealous of coparenting

[ovally]

DP and I have a blended family (SC and 1DC of our own).

I feel so burnt out at the minute that I keep finding myself wishing we'd separate so we could coparent. I don't know if that sounds horrendous.

We have SC 50/50 and I get jealous that his exP has has her own time most of the week, out a lot of nights, socialising, friends round etc because the kids aren't there. Instead I have DC 24/7 then plus SC 50/50.

I know I'm only feeling like this because I'm completely burnt out at this point, literally exhausted and feel like I don't have a second to come up for air. DP tells me to go out when I want but I'm such a homebound introvert that my biggest wish would be to just have the house to myself for a day or two, but DP only takes them out for 1-2 hours at a time and hasn't in a while.

Maybe I just need someone to relate to because I feel horrible for thinking it but I'm just so burnt out, feel like it's affecting me as a parent and a person.

Why does only take them out for such a short time? How old are they?

If you told him you needed a break would he take all the DC out for a day? Mine would and does. I take shared DC out so he can have time with the older ones too.

I would find that hard going too.how old are the SC and your DC?it's a hard situation to be in isn't it x

Are you doing most of the parenting then?

I have an ex with kids. I was so impressed he did so much with his kids because I have kids whose dad did so little. When we lived together yes he took them out but it was little old me doing the cooking cleaning and washing etc.

So to get to the point. We had a child. And split. Now I realise he wasn't an involved parent because he's a good guy. He was an involved parent because it was facilitated for him. He makes minimal effort with our joint child and I'm bitter

The SC aren't the problem (unless your DH is leaving you to handle it all). the problem is the 24/7 nature of your life. I think you need to ask Dh to take them out. But I had the same issue with DH - he didn't care if I went out but he has never been great bout taking kids out for a full day. So I've learnt to get my time to myself by going into th bedroom and closing the door or leaving the house.

I'm a single parent and my e x doesn't see our children. Im also jealous of those on 50/50 sounds like the best of both worlds to me! I have mine 24/7.

I’m waiting for someone to say “you knew what you were getting into” when you chose to have your own child, or does that only apply to step parents who struggle?

In all seriousness though, you’re human and it’s natural to feel jealous/resentful of another’s situation sometimes, especially when you’re feeling burnt out, so give yourself a break you’re allowed to feel those things, but the problem isn’t a step parenting one, it’s more ‘overwhelmed mum’ problem I think.