My partner has a daughter who is 11. I have a son who is 12. We both have a toddler together.
When we first were getting serious, my partner was giving his daughter £5 a week into her GoHenry account for pocket money. Fine, I had no thoughts about this or have any ideas etc as I didn't do this with my son. It was just mentioned in a convo and that was that.
Moving forward and years on, when we moved in together my son also had a GoHenry set up for him. They both then got £5 each a week.
Now, I was always brought up to 'earn' pocket money. I did chores around the house, had to keep my bedroom tidy, do homework etc. and I'd then be allowed some allowance to go out etc.
Since the kids are now older, I had spoken to my partner about the kids and this allowance. I said I think they both need to earn it. They can't expect £5 a week and not do anything for it, I just don't think it's a great learning curve for them.
He agreed. So, moving forward my son does his chores around the house, he empties dishwasher daily and refills, sorts his laundry out, tidies bedroom etc etc. he knows he must do these things to get his money on a Friday.
My partner said he'd speak to his ex regarding his daughter and to see if she can get her to help her around the house also; and that he thinks their daughter should be earning the money too. Ex agreed and said she'd get her to do stuff but finds it hard as she is 'lazy'. Her words, as she's not lazy when she's with us.
Anyway, this hasn't happened. The communication from ex wife is awful. So partner has stopped transferring the money and has explained to his daughter that he will save it up and when she is with us she can earn it that way.
Is this fair? I don't think it is but what can we do? My son is saying that he shouldn't have to do chores if SD isn't etc etc. any ideas what we could do that is fair?
Thank you! X
I would say, SD lives in Scotland and we live in London; we have her all half terms and school holidays. This is a court order too.