dh wants to buy dss car but that means ds will want one!

[zim]

I wonder if anyone could offer any help? Its actually my sisters dilema but i haven't got a clue what to advise her. her dh has always said he'll buy his ds a car when he's 17. now the time has come she doesnt agree on giving him so much money (its the insurance as much as the car) but doesnt want to seem like the wicked stepmother. also, this means that in a few years they will have to do the same for her ds but it something she doesnt agree on in principle (he doesnt NEED a car!!!)any ideas?

I am in the same situation at the moment. My dh's dd is 17 this year and he has always promised her a car. I have set him a budget of £1000 for the car and told him if we are doing that she has to show some effort and pay for her own insurance. I don't think it helps dc to be handed everything on a plate.

a promise is a promise (that's why I don't make them)

My advice - sit both boys down and say you are prepared to give £x towards a car. Do some research together and discover that the actual amount needed is £y. Explain that the extra must come from them via a part-time job or something, all the while explaining what the running costs are and this will have to be met by them.
There is nothing wrong with giving a helping hand through stages of life and it's a good thing when it can encourage good stuff like, earning, saving, responsibilities etc.

I agree with six on this - he's made a promise so it would be wrong to go back on it.

I was given help to buy a car and I don't feel like i was just handed stuff on a plate - I had a job to pay insurance, running costs, tax etc.

connartraceptive - that is my view, I wouldnt goback on it and I think it is good to help dc's out (my dad brought my first car) but like you I worked to pay for the other bits, and this is what I suggested to dh.

It teaches responsibility and the value of money.

That sounds perfectly reasonable to me caykon

Hi everyone,
thanks for your advice. He's bought the car! But dss mum is paying for insurance (fairs fair)