DD not wanting to join the rest of us, not sure how I feel and how best to handle?

[ProfessorInkling]

Hi, I have DS 15, DD 12, DSD 10. The kids all get on, but my DD is having a hard time lately just in general, hormones, periods, school. So she has become a little isolated, and DSD is less appealing to her now, than say a year ago when DD was still at primary. No worries, just ages and stages etc.

Anyway, family-ish event later, DS keen, DSD keen, DD wants to stay home alone.

Despite everything being mostly easy, I feel a bit weird about leaving her here alone, as if it's a sort of betrayal, if anyone can relate to that? Betrayal is a tad dramatic I'll grant you but you know?

If I were planning to take DS and DD somewhere, I'd possibly let DD opt out depending on what it was, so might for example go cycling with just DS. Equally, I do a fair bit with just DD.

Make her join us or let her opt out?

WWYD?

I wouldn't force her...but it depends on how long you'll be out for and if you're comfortable leaving her alone for that time.

Alternatively, you can stay home and let him go with his kids.

At that age I'd let them start opting our of things tbh

What's the event? It's up to you if you want to leave her alone - for me this would depend on her maturity, and the nature of the event. If it was for example a family bike ride, fair enough if she doesn't want to go, but if it was Aunt Mildred's boring birthday lunch I would probably make her go as it's all part of learning to do things you don't fancy for others.

I'd want to stay with DD and let H take DSD and DS.

It sounds like she's having a rough time and could do with a day just you and her.