Equality? Opinions please

[busmilk]

Me & DP have a child each.

My ds's dad isnt involved in his life, therefore he is always with me, which means its me ds & dp in our house. Dss stays every weekend.

Because of the set up and dp taking on a fulltime parent role (in a way, I still do everything pretty much) does that mean that I am therefore obliged to help out with dss as much as possible?

Sometimes dp is bed bound with migraines which means i then have both boys on weekend etc. taking them to places.

Dss offen has a lot of play dates (whatever the correct term is for a 12 year old) which means i have to drag ds all over the place for dss's activities.

Sometimes I honestly just cannot be bothered, no reflection at all on dss btw, but i sort of feel like I have to because dp has "taken on" (hate that term) my child full time.

So i guess i feel like even if i take dss places its still not even equal as dp has more time with ds.

Any opinions on this?

@hourbyhour101 I found play dates incongruous too. He’s 12.

I think that’s old enough that he should recognise that he needs to make sure that he asks if it’s ok to get a lift when he makes plans with his friends.

But, like you I suspect one of his parents is organising them. And it may well not be the adult who has the child at the weekend. Whichever parent it is, they need to stop organising someone else’s time for them (the OP’s).