How do you do Christmas with step children?

[3nough]

Just that really, just wondered how everyone else does Christmas when they have step kids.

DH and I have a toddler DD and he has a DD from previous relationship age 9.
We tend to do a Christmas day out as a family to see santa in the weeks leading up to Christmas, then we always pick up DSD Christmas night and have her for boxing day.

Christmas day we tend to open presents at home with DD and then go to see my family., she will open presents from my family and the presents my family have bought DSD we take home for her to open Christmas night after we pick her up.

Boxing day is Christmas day number two and the kids get up and open their presents (DD has half her presents Christmas day then half boxing day) and then we see DHs family.

Works for us as both children (and adults) get two Christmas days.

That sounds like a good arrangement but it means your Christmas is always split in two, no relaxing and having a drink as DH has to leave to pick up SD is she very close? But least you can build your own tradition ms around this, I think the every other Christmas is difficult as it's different every year and hard to build traditions

Christmas being split in two is a pain in the arse so I avoided that with my children and we alternate years, we still have traditions. Unfortunately my SC's mother can't possibly have it that way so we end up with it still being split every year for them.

We have a court order defining how the school holidays are split - basically right down the middle. So it all depends where Christmas falls whether DSD is with us or not.

How does it work of you have step children and children of your own? Do your own children wait until SC are there or do you do Christmas day with your own children then SC get their presents when they come round?

We do every other year. We live abroad so often go back to my family in the Uk. Ironically my DSC and my DC (all teens) prefer Christmas with my family in the UK.

DSC have changed their dates with mum this year so they can join us.

I have SC, I have my own DC and we have a shared DC. Our shared DC will open their presents, SC will come later but will wait until Boxing Day to open their presents with my DC. We'll probably have to hold some presents back for our toddler or else they'll lose their mind. But the SC and my DC like to do it together.

My hubby and I have two young children. I have an older child from previous relationship and he has two from previous relationship.
We don't do two Christmas days. We have one Christmas morning with presents. Step kids usually stay with their mum Xmas eve but Father Christmas delivers to both houses and they are here waiting at our house for when they come round Christmas Day afternoon when they get opened. They also have presents from family etc too.
Whilst your toddler is young you can get away with it, but as your daughter gets older having two Christmas days will become odd and it wouldn't be fair to have half presents one day and half the other.
This year my boy is with his dad Xmas eve (first time) but he is coming home at midday when he wil open his presents that have been delivered by father christmas.

If it were me I'd not split my DC Christmas presents in half. Your 9yo step child is at an age where Santa is not real anymore and you need to concentrate on keeping the magic alive for your toddler. I would have your child open all their presents from Santa on Christmas morning and retain one gift that is from your step daughter to give to your toddler on Boxing Day morning. As for explaining why there is two days Santa comes to deliver gifts... not sure, maybe you could say that Santa leaves them somewhere safe for the step child and you bring them in on Christmas morning

We always have dsd Boxing Day.

we have a normal Xmas day with our kids and see my family on the evening.

We collect dsd about 10-11pm Boxing Day and have her overnight. When she gets back to ours she opens her presents and we have a Boxing Day party food Buffett on the evening. We never do another ‘Christmas day’ as such. I can’t be bothered with the faff of doing another roast the very next day so it’s party food.

I also would never split my kids presents into two and do two Xmas mornings.
Xmas day is the 25th so I’d give everything on that day.

In theory, we alternate spending Christmas with my parents and DP's parents. We do mine on the year we don't have DSS, and DP's on the year we do. But in practice, DP's ex has had DSS most years so we end up celebrating with DP's parents on Boxing Day. We haven't done two Christmas' as such, but there are all the presents on that side to be opened and played with and usually a party food buffet.

I should add, we live an hour away so wouldn't want to split the actual day.

I actually have no idea what Xmas will look like this year. Dp and I have 2 each and a newborn together.

i do every other Xmas / DP does half day split. His ex won’t confirm plans other than he has Xmas morning.

i always just did Xmas on whatever day I had my kids as they always requested Xmas dinner on boxing day if that was our Xmas!

Christmas for us is a three-day event SD stays every other Christmas
All dependent on when people are working
This year?
My mum is coming on Christmas Eve. We will do a mini Christmas dinner open our presents from each other our DC will open his presents from his granny.

Christmas Day, we do presents for us, all SD here or not.

Boxing day the in-laws are coming as it’s not a SD staying for Christmas. We will then do Christmas presents for the in-laws and SD.

Santa only brings SD one present dependent on which house she wakes up at Christmas morning

The way you do it sounds just fine to me.

We always did split presents when my two girls were with their dad on Christmas Day. DS1 (my stepson was here full time as his mum had passed away) opened half Christmas Day, half Boxing Day.

DS1 and the girls actually lamented the loss of their “double Christmas” when they stopped going. I think they genuinely thought we (and ex) bought them more because they got presents two days rather than clicking that it was the same number split up.

The only difference we made was that the big family meal (in laws etc) switched between Christmas and Boxing Day so the whole family was always here.

Me and ex do what you do op works out fine but we don't live very far and ds enjoys it he can just walk round to his dad's as he's 14.

We alternate each year. Does your dh never get Christmas Day with his daughter?

I loved having 2 Christmases as a child! Still do in fact.

My DC have Christmas day with me and then go to their Dads on boxing day morning. Well sometimes, when their step mum decides they're allowed. We used to alternate Christmas Day until they were banned from the house.

@WeDontNeedToTalkAboutJamie I'm sorry your children are not able to go to their dads!
I feel as we get older Christmas is less and less about us and more about extended family. I would love to cocoon my little family and not leave the house but I suppose family commitments such as in laws and step children are an inevitable part of life, we must just try our best to enjoy it

Its interesting how SC get 2 of everything and RC only get one...how is it fair that Santa gives SC presents at both houses? So they get double?
I think its silly parents that say that - when kids talk about together it looks like favouritism. Father Christmas only gives presents per child not per household...So wherever they are should be where they get 'santas' present - presents at the other house are from family etc

I have 3 DSCs. We alternate xmas. So last year their mum had them xmas eve, we picked then up 2pm xmas day and dropped them back off boxing day. This year we'll have them xmas eve which lands on our week anyway so no back and forth this year. They'll open their presents in the morning and we'll go visit my parents around midday on the way to drop them off at 2pm.

We're getting married on NYE so we're looking forward to having a quiet xmas afternoon /evening just the 2 of us before the chaos of wedding prep begins.

Your arrangement sounds ideal and the kids will love having 2 xmases. It's nice that you keep half of DDs gifts back so she has some to open with her sister.

I agree with this tbh. Having 2 Christmas' is one thing and down to individual choice but I don't think FC should come twice for one child.

We do Xmas on Xmas eve. My 2 dsc and my DD. Then we do another Christmas with my DD on Christmas. Her dad always stays with us Xmas eve and spends Xmas with us. My DD then goes to her dads Xmas night/boxing day and out DSC come over for boxing day.

She gets 2 Xmas days and so do they so everyone is happy. My DH doesn't want to be travelling around Xmas day so is not bothered about the splitting it. The kids seem happy and it's just a day we know there's no Santa so it's less about the magic now.

Boxing day is Christmas day number two and the kids get up and open their presents (DD has half her presents Christmas day then half boxing day) and then we see DHs family. I think that's fine as a toddler but pretty off as they get older. DD shouldn't be having to have a split christmas to that extreme if they are with you the whole time.

DH used to do presents got delivered Xmas day at both houses - so his side of the family to his house and mums to her house then whoever had boxing day didn't have a full on 2nd Christmas but the dsc got to open their presents then.

It's much nicer for the kids now they have agreed to alternate the whole 3 days, no one wants to be stuck in a car.

I guess it depends how you do the father Christmas thing. He only does the stockings here so the main presents are from family.