Mum annoyed by birthday gift.

[Eggshelly]

Genuinely not sure if I have done something "wrong" or not.

DSD got ears peirced for birthday so I bought her a nice little necklace and earing set. Ex is complaining I spent too much and showed her up. For context dad and I buy seperate gifts as I feel its nicer for them to get something from me to show I care for them and am not just tag my name on something dad gets them.

Oh and it's earrings, you can never have too many right?

How much did they cost?

I can't see anything wrong with it really, but how much did you spend?

I personally wouldn't care, I'd think it was nice you bought my child something, but if there is a massive disparity in spending I can see why the other parent might feel a bit shit, but imo it's about the child.

It was £40ish I usually spend about £30 but this little set looked just right for her. My own money not DH's. He got her a jacket she had her eye on.

but if there is a massive disparity in spending I can see why the other parent might feel a bit shit I was wondering if maybe I put my foot in it and should have got something else. Like is ear piercing a big right of passage and I've intruded?

That sounds fair, I think you just have to ignore this stuff from her mum.

Personally I think £40 is fine. There's nothing special about earrings as far as I know!

Ok good. I shall ignore. She might have other stuff going on or something.

Ignore her. It's not like you BOught her a Cartier bracelet

I think that’s a really great and personal gift! I don’t see how it’s intruding or anything and definitely not your issue about cost!

She sounds pathetic and childish. Good for you for being such a thoughtful SM. The girl is lucky.

Ignore. That's such a lovely gift! We have it the opposite way, if we don't spend £100's, we get accused of not caring!

You’ve done nothing wrong. I can never understand how these parents (normally mothers!) can’t put their children first and see how much more the child benefits, rather than their me me me attitude that they’re somehow losing something by their child getting another present!

I think your gift sounds perfect and the right amount of money spent. Ignore and move on.

Oh we get that if I refuse to contribute to her hobby or take her shopping separately from her dad.. its like Hello? Am I her parent? No so don't demand things off me.

I shall, thank you. Just needed that sense check. :)

I wonder if it is DSD's favourite present and so mum's nose is a bit out of joint?

Not your problem really, it shows you are caring and in tune with DSD which is lovely, really.
But I can see how the mum would have to be Mother Teresa not to find it hard if her daughter prefers your present over hers.

Aw that's lovely, you sound a lovely step mum
Ignore her, she's creating an issue where there isn't one. If my children ended up with a SM, I'd want someone who cared about them as much as you clearly do.

True, I suppose her actually buying the holes and then everyone going ooh nice earrings might be annoying. But still, she shouldn't be moaning about it to DH.