I would really appreciate any advice, as I don't have any friends that are also step parents and really not sure how to deal with this situation that has come up.
I met my stepson when he was only 1 years old. My partner and ex girlfriend broke up when he was very young. I didn't meet his son right away, but have known him since he was super young, so as far as he's concerned, I've pretty much always been around and seen him almost every weekend since.
He's now 4 years old and we've built a really strong bond. We have always got on like a house on fire, we have so much fun together, he tells me he loves me all the time and I say the same back. He gives me hugs all the time. If he falls and gets hurt, he runs to me for comfort. He comes round every weekend and, although there were tough times during his terrible twos, we always laugh together and play together. When he's on his way over, he always asks his dad if I'm going to be there and explains how much he can't wait to see me. When I'm not around, he apparently always asks for me and says he wants me to come home. It's been a dream and I always thank my lucky stars that it's gone so well.
Last weekend, the same happened, lots of fun, all positivity. He even kissed me on the cheek before he left and told me he loved me when saying goodbye. But today, randomly, out of nowhere, my partner got a message from his ex saying that she was concerned about what he has been saying happens when he's at our place. The most alarming being what he said when he came back last weekend. He's apparently said that I have been hurting him physically. Hurting his legs and tummy. He said that I hate it when he's with us and I get so upset that he's at ours, that I lock myself away in my bedroom so I don't have to see him, and he said he no longer wants to come to our house because I don't like him.
To say both my partner and are were shocked is an understatement. A real WTF moment. I am literally still in complete disbelief and honestly speechless. I have no idea where this could have come from. I always show him so much love, I'm never cold to him and honestly don't think I have ever even suggested I didn't want him there. I literally spend hours every weekend playing games with him, chasing him around (which is his favourite) and playing hide and seek. Honestly the whole weekend is about him and what he wants to do.
I tried to think perhaps I had tickled his tummy and accidentally hurt him or something, but I haven't! I haven't tickled him or really done anything physical apart from hugs when he asks for one. I did shut myself in a room one week, because I was really ill (I ended up learning I had covid), but even then we were blowing each other kisses from the door and I was telling him how much I missed him.
His biological mum said that although he does make up stories and has lied occasionally, she's getting understandably concerned and wanted to address it. She said regardless if it's true or not, I'm obviously showing resentment towards him and he's obviously feeling some bad vibes. My partner explained his shock to her and explained that I get on with his son really well.
I don't want to turn it back on his biological mum at all, but I do know she really dislikes me as I'm the new partner and has flat out refused to meet me. She carries some resentment about the fact that my partner moved on relatively quickly after they broke up. I'm wondering whether he has sensed her dislike of me and doesn't want to upset her so says bad things instead? I really don't know what else to think.
I don't know what to do. I'm completely floored by the whole situation. Do I continue as normal on the weekend? Do I give my partner and him a weekend alone together? Maybe he doesn't feel he gets enough time with dad? I'm at a loss and really would appreciate any advice or opinions on what could have happened for us to end up in this situation.