Bit of a weird situation and I don't want to give too much identifying info away...
But basically my husband has older DC with his ex and we have DC together.
My husband and his ex are absolutely atrocious at communicating with each other. Really terrible. It makes arranging anything with DSC a logistical nightmare and I have repeatedly spoken to H about this issue and told him he needs to get it sorted.
Because of their lack of communication it means they are always relying on other people to step in at the last minute to help with various things, school runs, childcare, holiday cover, hobby drop offs that sort of thing.
Anyway, long and short of it is I've taken a big step back from being available to help with they mess up and have put the onus back on H to arrange things properly by speak to his ex (which they still fail at 9 times out of 10).
My parents help quite a lot with our DC. I always ensure this is clearly organised with them and everyone knows what's happening and when because it's surely just the normal thing to do.
Anyway, when I've spoken to my parents about these issues with H and communication surrounding DSC (I speak to my parents openly about a lot of stuff), they have said they'd be happy to help with things with DSC too if it helps H and his ex.
I have said no way, I'd really rather they not.
My reasoning for this is not to be unkind but because I know it will get used and abused and I do not under any circumstances want my parents dragged into the mess like I was for a while. It's chaotic and unorganized.
Obviously I can't stop my parents offering to help. But I know they'll respect it if I ask them not to.
AIBU for asking my parents to stay out of the situation with my SC even though they help with our DC?