Do you do a second Christmas?

[CactusLemonSpice]

A question for those who alternate Christmas and boxing day contact each year.

If you have SCs and also resident DC, what do you do on the years SC are with mum for Christmas day?

Do you do a second Christmas dinner on boxing day? Or not do another as SC had the dinner with mum?

Also what about Christmas stockings? Do you only do them for SC on the years they are with you on Christmas day, or do you make them one and save theirs for boxing day even though they had one at mums? (Kids who no longer believe in santa)

Trying to get my head around the details. Wondering what others do!

The two ways of doing it:

Option A: chilled boxing day with presents for SK and nice food/snacks but no roast/stocking

Option B: second Christmas with a second roast, presents and stocking for SK

My ex and I alternate Christmas and New Years (period of 4 /5 days of each allowing each one of us to take the kids to visit family etc).
Whichever parent the child is with is where they have Christmas dinner/ stockings etc. We don’t rerun a second Christmas. That being said, we will exchange presents with my family etc at some point before / after Christmas but that’s about it.

Option c. Not a roast something else nice. Stocking (from santa he knows they have two homes) and gifts

We do Option A, usually with DPs whole family so it's "cousin day" to the kids. We've never done stockings tbh.

My DP alternates Christmas and New Year with his ex.

So the year we have SC New Year we have some kind of NYE celebration.

SC gets their Xmas presents on change over day which is a day in the middle of this and doesn't get stockings. This doesn't matter as all the kids we know get tonnes of sweets and little gifts anyway from various people.

We've always done a second Xmas

We have big families and lots of people all over the place so we often do multiple Xmas meals !

I was a stepchild and always had Xmas day at my mum’s and Boxing Day at my dad’s.

For a few years we did a full Christmas on Boxing Day… but when me and my sister finally admitted we didn’t really fancy a full roast two days in a row, we stopped (pretty sure my dad and stepmum were relieved!).

Instead we had a Christmas buffet that always felt really special. Santa knew we had two homes so we always got presents and a stocking in the morning. I think if the children who are there on Xmas day get a stocking, it would be really mean for your stepchildren not to have one too.

Though my stepsiblings are few years older than us so there was never any issues with explaining why our stocking and presents arrived a day late… if yours are younger you could hang your stepchildrens out on Xmas morning and just say “ooh we’ll have to save this for x to open tomorrow!”. No magic lost that way .

@Just10moreminutesplease

I was a stepchild and always had Xmas day at my mum’s and Boxing Day at my dad’s.

For a few years we did a full Christmas on Boxing Day… but when me and my sister finally admitted we didn’t really fancy a full roast two days in a row, we stopped (pretty sure my dad and stepmum were relieved!).

Instead we had a Christmas buffet that always felt really special. Santa knew we had two homes so we always got presents and a stocking in the morning. I think if the children who are there on Xmas day get a stocking, it would be really mean for your stepchildren not to have one too.

Though my stepsiblings are few years older than us so there was never any issues with explaining why our stocking and presents arrived a day late… if yours are younger you could hang your stepchildrens out on Xmas morning and just say “ooh we’ll have to save this for x to open tomorrow!”. No magic lost that way .

Yes to the christmas buffet! Thats what happened here!Tbh I prefer the bloody buffet!

This is sort of what I was thinking, but just checking I'm not being extra!

That was a reply to @Bubblty

We'll probably do nice food but not a second roast, hang stockings for all kids xmas eve then save SK one for boxing day.

I had xmas with mum then boxing day with dad as a child, no second roast or stockings at dad's (but presents and lots of sweets) however in my case there are siblings involved so it's different (my step siblings were much older). I always preferred boxing day to xmas day as more chilled. Hope we can find the right balance.

@motheroflions good idea about stockings all out on xmas morning then one saved. That will make sense to toddler too.

What do DH and your DSC want to do?

[quote CactusLemonSpice]@motheroflions good idea about stockings all out on xmas morning then one saved. That will make sense to toddler too.[/quote]
Yeah this is a good idea I think. Then that way the years they are with you it is still the same for toddler.

This year my DSC have requested a curry for when we see them on boxing day (this is "special" in our house as we get naans and sides and stuff). So I think they like having a break from Christmas food.

@AnneLovesGilbert

What do DH and your DSC want to do?

@AnneLovesGilbert DH thinks no second roast and it doesn't matter as either way about stockings as SD will get presents on boxing day and something nice to eat. SD doesn't care about specifics of Christmas plans, just looks at me and says 'well when I get here I'll get the presents', clearly even she thinks I am overthinking! Didn't ask her about stocking as wasnt sure what to do. But think I'll do as pp suggested.

We do option B.
We also repeat New Years Eve. No gifts then though.

My ex sends me money for presents for stockings, no point in having 2

I'm pretty sure Christmas buffet will get the winning vote here. Thanks everyone.

@Suzi888

We do option B. We also repeat New Years Eve. No gifts then though.

What do you do on new years eve? The countdown and stuff? Just curious as I don't normally do much so wondering what fun I could be missing out on!

If we have Christmas Day - we do the full works.

If we have Boxing Day, we do full Christmas morning present opening, with snacks and drinks etc but we tend to have a more relaxed party/picky dinner or walk to the pub. Nobody wants Christmas dinner two days in a row! But I will quite often do a full roast over the New Years weekend instead.

I used to do the full works but then realised it was so much extra work and the kids would prefer pizza anyway 😂😂

They were talking about Xmas on the new BBC stepmum podcast tonight. Worth a listen! www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/p0bb7pwy

[quote user47000000000]I used to do the full works but then realised it was so much extra work and the kids would prefer pizza anyway 😂😂

They were talking about Xmas on the new BBC stepmum podcast tonight. Worth a listen! www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/p0bb7pwy[/quote]
Thanks for the link, I will definitely have a listen!

@Bubblty
I (pre covid) get all the family over, cook a roast, play games, have a few drinks, some might watch a film or a soap, chat and do a countdown. 🎄
New Years Day I take the decs down and tidy up.

We generally follow the same pattern every Christmas. Kids are adults now but still do the same!
Christmas Eve, most of Christmas Day at Mums. To Dad's early evening for more presents, buffet style evening meal and games. Boxing Day at Dads. Used to then pootle off to see Grandparents in between Christmas and New Year but death and nursing homes are where we're at now with that sadly.