Feeling like I'm unreasonable... But Im not

[Pleaseaddcaffine]

Dp 4 kids (one is our joint) has eow and 1 night in week. Dp is Self employed works when dsc are not here 7 days a week and I woke full time (main earner) over compressed hours x 5 days , 2 of which are shorter days.
Dp wants to leave all kids with me after 9pm and go to work returning in small hours or 5am ish next morning on Friday sat and Sunday contact weekends.
I've said flat no, it's his contact time and he will be too tired next day and miserable. He needs to manage his time better or do work stuff he can do at home.
He keeps bringing it up and basically I won't so this n that or he will have to work late all week and never see me or our ds.
I've still said no but i'm feeling pushed into a corner and I do not respond well to being bullied so I'm getting very short over it.
I have our ds every weekend and always have him after I finished work till bed time. I always cook and feel I do enough generally.

YABU

He sounds like a rubbish dad putting his hobby business above his children, which he keeps producing despite having no interest in spending time with them, presumably for the purpose of locking a meal ticket/house slave women in.

Men. Ffs.

Oh this poster has posted before. He’s a shitty dad who can barely parent on his best days if then who larks off on his hobby 7 days a week bringing in pennies while the op parents and works and pays for everything. The sooner she gets rid the better, and so what if he never sees 2 yo again , he only watched tv with him anyway so not sure what he’d be missing out on.

When mine were younger under 12 I would never have them in nights there dad went to work as I didn't want to be solely responsible for 3 kids ( I didnt have any at that time) it's only when they became older teens I didn't mind as they can entertain themselves etc

No because you know full well that he'll end up too tired during the day so you'll end up looking after all the kids then too whilst he sleeps. It's not just overnight.

Is he proposing these extra hours every weekend or just on contact weekends?

It sounds excessive tbh and if a business requires these additional late nights on what seems like an ongoing basis, which isn't good enough IMO.

If it was just a one off because he has something urgent to do that would be different.

I don't blame you. Stick to your guns.

so he wants to continue working in THAT job cos he 'likes' it despite it making him miserable after work and not giving him enough suitable time with his own children or with spending as a family and partner to you?

Yet he wants you to take on his other 3 kids to make it easier for him?!!!!
Ha!

He chose to have 3 kids he can sort out his own parental responsibilities or get a different job.