Telling my step daughter im not her "real" mum..

[Girlmum2]

Hi I'm looking for a little bit of advice...

We didn't want to do this for another 3/4 years however due to current circumstances within our lives it looks like we need to tell our 5 and a half year old that I'm not her biological mother... I feel like she's too young to understand but I would rather she hears it from me and not someone else.

Has anyone told their step kids at this age or round about? How did you do it? How did they react to the news?

The little one thinks I'm her mum (obviously) she can't remember ever seeing or knowing her real mother due to her not actually bothering with the kid or staying consistent in her life.

Please help a very stressed out mummy out 🙏

''he just never gave himself the chance to fall in love with you''

Good one.

Good luck OP

Let us know how it goes, I like the idea of the books suggested above to start the conversation.

We went with "chose you", I think it's a good age to tell them.
My daughter did constantly forget though we had to reiterate it to her every couple of months because she didn't really understand.
It's hard for them to understand when they haven't seen the other person, kids are very much about who is there in their little world.
My daughter was absolutely fine about it, she doesn't remember ever being told.

I hope you go with the books to start the conversation. It's a bit later than I did but still better now than when she is older.

Also OP regarding you wanting to know people's children's reactions to the news my DD didn't care it wasn't an issue, it was just a piece of extra information, as I say she kept on forgetting so it obviously wasn't a massive deal for her or something that played on her mind.

Waiting 3-4 years I think she would have been too old. By then they have changed alot and with hormones arising it would have been a bad idea and it would have made it a big deal.

You will be fine OP don't worry about it too much, you are the one that is present in her life and that's all she will really care about right now.
Showing her books on how there are so many different types of families is also really helpful I did the same too.