Calling new partner Step Mum

[Sproutycakes18]

I left my abusive ex 1.5 years ago now.

Long story short, he's onto his second engagement to a South African woman to be able to get a visa to live there. On both occasions he has referred to the new partner as our daughter's (she's 2.5) step mum.

The thing is it really angers me because I've been practically been a single Mum since she was born, she doesn't need a step mum. As my ex is moving to SA permanently (fingers crossed) neither him or his new partner will have much of a role in her life anyway and it just feels really disrespectful.

Thing is talking to him is pointless, might as well argue with a brick wall. AIBU?

It sounds likely that he is saying this as a ploy to convince the fiancée, or the visa authorities or both that this relationship is genuine. Plus I’m sure he knows it will annoy you.

That’s not to minimise how it makes you feel, of course. It’s horrible.

As you’re getting shot of him, I’d ignore his nonsense as much as possible - don’t give him the satisfaction.

Ignore it. It will have no relevance on your little girls life.

Sounds like an utter idiot

He’s an idiot. And a shockingly shit dad to be considering moving so far from his child.

Hopefully he moves and you don’t have to deal with him anymore.

Who is he referring to these women as that to? You? You know they’re short relationships and it means nothing what he calls her. Other people? If they know either of you they’ll know what he’s like and chuckle.

Of course it annoys you, it would annoy anyone. But he’s a muppet so give it less head space.

Agree. It's annoying but try not to let it bother you.

Hopefully he'll be gone soon.

I think you need to try and detach a bit. It doesn't really matter what he refers to his partner as. He could call her a fairy godmother and it's meaningless without a genuine connection with your daughter.

It's just a term it doesn't really mean anything, she's not trying to replace you

It does sound like he’s doing it to annoy y.
ou or or convince the authorities that she is actually part of the Childs life as well

Personally I refuse to be called that it might change with time for now for me no I am not the child’s mum nor do I take on a mother role more of a fun responsible adult She calls me by my name booked may be different when my son start speaking

You aren't together anymore so you need to ignore him and stop arguing with him. He also can't disrespect you if you stop caring what he does.