I feel that at home all I'm good for is cooking, cleaning, ferrying the kids around, washing and doing general house stuff. I get little support from my partner but a high expectation of what I need to do as "I'm around more" . I just feel so down.
My step children live with us 4 days a week. When they aren't here I can just about manage but when they arrive I feel so overwhelmed by the extra work and lack of help/support.
My OH is very much the 'fun time' dad. I can count on one hand the amount of times he has disciplined his children. He's all about fu and nothing about boundaries, manners and respect.
I can't remember the last time I felt appreciated or respected by them and him in my own home. His DC don't like me much and that just makes me feel even worse about the situation. They make me feel invisible. At bedtime for example they will say night to everyone apart from me. If I leave to go out to a friends I'll say bye and they will be the only ones not to say anything. If I tell them off and say "can you go to your room and think about what's just happened" they will look at their dad and ask if they have to and he'll say "no, don't worry about it". I am undermined pretty much the whole time they are here. Sometimes if my partner doesn't agree with what I say to them (like I don't think you should be doing that or don't do that please) he will say to me, in front of them. Stop being a bully. I mean Im so far from being a bully.
I know it's not his DCs fault. They are really well behaved kids and thriving at school, but just at home I feel like their dad is letting them down and letting me down. I just wish he'd have my back with them and actually be a good dad rather than their mate and a good partner.
He used to be such an amazing man but over the years his expectations on my role in the home have just become very stereotypical. I feel like a 1950s housewife that juggles so many plates that I daren't stop.