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Feeling desolate

2 replies

piggyinablanket · 28/12/2019 01:54

My stepson of 11 years has grown up very fast. He’s only 20 yet has just moved in with his girlfriend whom he has been with for a year. I am happy, as he is happy, yet, his dad and i are lost. We’ve spent the last 11 years organising our annual leave to ensure we have time with him, as well as him coming to ours every other weekend. My own dd is used to this routine, as are we all. But now, Christmas has happened. My most favourite time of year. My stepson spent 5 days with us which was magical, but he left yesterday. This made me realise things will never be the same. He now lives with his girlfriend whom is very close to her own dparents and his life is drifting away from us. I treasured this Christmas, with both my 16 yr old dd and 20 yr old dss sitting on our bed opening their stockings. It just feels things will never be the same again now. His gf, whom is 19 was understanding that he came to us for xmas but i know that this is the last year it’ll be just him. Don’t get me wrong, i have no objection to his gf or her family...it’s just hard, and weird. Our routine has been set for so very long, we either had him xmas or new year. And now, he has his own life and choices, which we respect, but it didn’t stop his dad and me howling tears, after he left. He may not be my son, but i love him like one. Am sure going to miss our usual routine...kids growing up sucks!!

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
Bluerussian · 28/12/2019 02:12

How you're feeling is quite normal but you will get used to it. You sound lovely and so does he. It will just be a question of sharing time with him from now on but you and husband and his sister will not be abandoned!
Your daughter will still be around for a bit longer. None of this happens overnight.

I'm glad you had a good Christmas. Flowers

pumpkinpie01 · 28/12/2019 09:24

Kids grow up , old routines change and are replaced with new ones that is how life is. But I'm sorry howling with tears does seem rather excessive .

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