Dad not parenting?

[Debbie01]

How do you approach your significant other about his 3 yr old eating in bed and making a mess?
It burns my blood he let's him do that and then he complains about stuff been dirty.
How would you approach this?

If it's your house too then just tell the kid your house rules just as you would tell any guest who's crossing boundaries in your home.

I would be scared of a choking risk at 3 years. A child of that age needs supervision whilst eating.

Bring in a household rule that everyone eats at the table?

I agree with twentyeight12- rules for everyone!

You say it directly. Like I did when faced with similar. That no drinks or snacks (except water) are taken upstairs by any children. And that meals are eaten at the table.

End of conversation. It’s ridiculous letting a 3 year old eat in bed.

I'd say 'dp, please can you ask DS not to eat in bed as it makes a mess, thanks'.

Or tell DSS yourself if you have a good relationship, that we're not eating in bed anymore

I think you're in for a rough ride if you don't even feel you're allowed to say something as simple as this. You need to create an environment in which you mentioning something like this that relates to his child isn't seen as unacceptable.

I agree with AE. It's your home too at the end of the day.

I tell my SCs to go and make their beds, bring glasses out of their room, no sweets upstairs etc... And I don't ask their dad for permission before I do either. It's my house as well and these aren't unreasonable things. I'm certainly not cleaning up after them constantly because I'm too scared to ask them to do it themselves.

I'm not their parent no but this is my house and I'm an adult (it's their home obviously but not to do in whatever they like) and my H has made sure his kids respect me enough to listen to me.