DPs ex wants him to pay her cash as she has an IVA

[Ulverstonian]

Hi everyone,

DP has a daughter from a previous relationship and pays CMS monthly to his ex by bank transfer. She has recently taken out an IVA and has to send monthly bank statements to the insolvency practitioner. She has asked if DP can pay her CMS in cash so that the insolvency practitioner doesn’t see it and include it as part of her income.

I’m concerned that if he pays her cash there will be no record of the payments and she could claim that he hasn’t paid her any CMS. Also, surely an insolvency practitioner will see that the CMS is money intended for DSD and won’t see it as DPs ex income?

If the money is sent and marked as child maintenance then the Iva can't legally touch it and it's disregarded.

Ignore my post I thought it was the same as benefits as it's not the ex's money but money for the child so couldn't be counted. That's disgusting they are allowed to do that.

Either get a receipt book and get both to sign and date it so you have a record. Or if she lives near a Tesco you could buy Tesco gift card, it can then be used for groceries or DDs clothes etc.

Money saving expert is also saying that the CMS will also be included as total income but they will take into account DSDs expenses when working out DPs ex necessary outgoings.

As people have said, I think we’re best off continuing to pay it by bank transfer to DPs ex. Definitely not cash as she could claim it hasn’t been paid and as it’s there on her last 12 months of bank statements the IP would question why it had stopped and encourage her to pursue it.

We already pay for school dinners (as DPs ex had stopped paying for them so we picked it up) along with the other things I mentioned above.

DP used to pay more than the minimum but stopped when he found out that his ex had stopped paying for school dinners and DSD was wearing school uniform that was far too small. With hindsight this was probably because his ex was having to pay so much in debt repayments.

It is disgusting that the IP can include the CMS as income.

The money is a contribution from DSDs father to her living expenses and therefore well being. DP and DSD don’t have the debt so the CMS really shouldn’t be included.

The only other thing that DP pays to his ex is the 30% of holiday club that she can’t claim back from the DWP but that’s a separate bank transfer. He could stop that and give her cash instead, as he’s not legally obliged to pay the holiday club money there doesn’t need to be a record of it.

I reckon thats the best option OP!

Absolutely do NOT give her cash. Dp's exw is appalling with money (not saying this woman is) & dp has been told in no uncertain terms by his solicitor to ever giving her cash as he would be leaving himself wide open to accusations of non payment of maintenance. Leave this alone & assist in other ways if you feel you should.
What are the circumstances of her IVA?

Thanks Magda.

What do you mean by circumstances? I understand that she’s got a number of credit cards and the debt totals double figures. I don’t know how she has managed to get into this much debt though - she doesn’t seem to live a flashy lifestyle. DP is going to talk to her on Sunday night when we drop of DSD and explain that the CMS will still have to be a bank transfer but he will give her cash for holiday club, however if she doesn’t use it to pay for childcare and gets in debt to them, then we are not bailing her out.

Also DPs ex rents a flat from DPs sister and I know that DPs sister rents it to her for substantially less than market value and has never put the rent up. DP is going to phone his sister today and check that ex isn’t in arrears.

I don’t recall hearing about any expensive holidays, she drives a basic 10 year old car, there’s no sign of expensive hair extensions, nails, designer clothes etc. I’m a bit flummoxed as to how she has got into this much debt tbh.

I think your being disingenuous not all parents make claims their ex doesn't pay when in fact they do? Where is the evidence that she will claim that he hasn't paid? You said yourself she doesn't seem to waste money anywhere why would she do this?

Anyway you can pay the childcare directly to them, bypassing her accounts/purse all together?

@slipperywhensparticus

The IP will question why the CMS is no longer being paid, as it will be on her previous bank statements. Then encourage her to pursue it. She will have to explain that it is being paid in cash / into a different bank account. Based on the threads I read last night on moneysaving expert, the IP will go through her previous bank statements with a fine tooth comb to check that she isn’t diverting income somewhere else.

@RainOrSun

That’s a good idea. I’ll mention it to DP.

Hi @Ulverstonian - what I meant by circumstances is that did she get into debt for a specific reason? eg. job loss/illness or is she just really bad with money?
I ask because as I said pp my dp's exw has proven atrocious with money. He gives her hundreds every week for 3 kids (don't want to mention exact amt as it would be outing) and she still comes looking for more & now claims she has debts which she has asked him to cover. He has said no. He's been advised by solicitor to give her nothing in cash, ever. And if things are dire - ie kids in too small school uniform - to purchase himself & deduct from the maintenance. We're not in the UK so maintenance 'rules' a bit different.
If your oh's ex is bad with money then my advice would be to do similar - pay for holiday club directly to holiday club etc.
Dp's kids says she doesn't do anything extravagant but just shops non stop & then throws stuff out!?!

In an insolvency situation you are expected to do everything you can to maximise your income, so even if you did 'hide' the CMS the fist question the IP will ask is why it's not being received and evidence that it's being applied for/chased so it's a pointless exercise.

@userplus - thanks, that’s what I’d gleaned from moneysavingexpert last night. No point in DP creating a risk for himself when the IP is going to question it anyway.

@Magda72 no job loss or illness. DP says that she’s had credit card debt for years but she always just used to move it on to different cards. He thinks it’s gradually built up over a number of years and snowballed over the last 12 months or so.

Hiya - I work as a debt adviser for a charity and only very rarely would I advise an IVA as the best option. If you or your partner have the kind of relationship with her that means you can talk openly about this stuff, please ask her if she's had proper advice. If she's been approached by an IVA company they've probably given her the hard sell and they've probably convinced her an IVA is her only option. I see so many clients who this has happened to and it turns out that they've been mid-advised. Suggest she speaks to an adviser at her local CAB. If she's struggling day to day then she may well struggle to maintain payments for 5 years. Depending on her situation/assets/debt level etc she could qualify for a Debt Relief Order and get all her debt written off without having to commit to unaffordable monthly payments.

Also - yes, as others have said, the CM would definitely count as income and the IVA form will want the last 3 months bank statements so there's no hiding it unfortunately.

@82YorkshireLass

Thank you. I’ll show this thread to DP later. He maybe able to mention it to his ex when we drop DSD off tomorrow.

Yes do get him to write a cheque for the holiday club

You need evidence he is paying it. If not, as many people have said, she could claim he isn't paying maintenance.

Ask her to set up an account in her kids name and you can put it in there.

Can she claim for free school meals

@Frankola that wouldn’t work, see posts above for why.

@GreenTulips I’ll mention it to DP and see if he can check when he drops DSD off later.