paying for holidays

[Stickytoffeepuddingyum]

So i guess this isn't so much a steparent problem but just want to get consensus from parents.

What age did you stop paying for your children to go on annual holiday?

My df stopped paying once we were in full time work, i was around 17 and by then wanted to go on holiday with friends anyway.

DH has 2 children, one 20 and one 14, we have a child together who is 6.

DH thinks we should pay for as long as they want to come, my issue is dsc has a decent job and doesn't pay rent with her dm, so probably has more disposable income than we do, we can't afford to pay for a holiday for all of us, as dc 14 counts as adult price.

He thinks i am being selfish but i think for the sake of everyone going on holiday it is not unreasonable to ask her to pay her part of the holiday. This is for next year, so over 12 months notice.

[raspberryk]

I don't understand why anyone over the age of 16 would even go on the family holiday, certainly once working you pay for your own holiday. I think I disowned family holidays after I was 14, until mid to late 20's so that my kids could spend time with grandparents.

[chzarind]

don't understand why anyone over the age of 16 would even go on the family holiday,

Really? Are you always so short sighted

[raspberryk]

I do wear glasses ...
But I don't get it, hang around parents and younger siblings? I have a 4 and 6 yr age gap between me and my siblings and I couldn't wait to get away. I stayed home by myself and loved it while they went away with my parents from 14/15 onwards.
Or go off and have your own holidays with your bf/gf/friends.
But then I moved out when I was 18 sooo...

[chzarind]

But I don't get it, hang around parents and younger siblings?

Mine enjoy spending time with us, it's not unheard of; I would hate for them to have reached 14/15 and withdraw from the family. Fortunately they didn't.

Or go off and have your own holidays with your bf/gf/friends.

They do this too.

It doesn't have to be one or the other.

[raspberryk]

Ok at under 16, but at 20? I just find it weird. Honestly if you asked most teens what they wanted to do they'd probably not want to go either. Some of my poor friends were dragged along til 17/18 because their parents wouldn't let them stay home alone and they hated it.
And in my experience you can't always have multiple holidays for both financial reasons and annual leave ones.

[RubbingHimSourly]

My DD is 20, she has significant special needs and lives in supported accomodation and even she pays for her own travel, accommodation and meals and activities when we go away. I just can't afford or justify subsidising her. She also needs to learn to budget if she wants nice things.

[Saltystraw]

Does he want you to pay for both kids forever? Or just until the youngest is an adult? In which case it’s not fair the the youngest if her older sister got 6 years more of free holidays then she did.

Tell him you can’t pay for both of them forever and you want to make it equal for both kids. So you will pay for the younger up until the same age.