Let's share the lovely bits of being a step parent

[NormaTallulahPorchaBest]

All too often on here step parents and step kids seem to get bad press one way or another so it would be nice to share some lovely bits .

I'm in the unusual position ( I think !) of living with 2 of my sdcs full time but only having my own children 50/50 . There is also 1 another sdc that lives with his dm but is here often .

This weekend we have had all children together , we have done nothing out of the ordinary just pottered around the garden , out on their bikes , walked the dogs etc and now even though it is 11 o'clock at night I can hear them all giggling ( they are having a mass sleepover , all in the one room ) trying really hard not to be too loud or alert us to the fact they are actually trying to get to midnight so they can have a midnight feast I pretended not to notice when one by one they popped down stairs earlier to get snacks

It's just lovely , all these little people that for one reason or another don't have 'their' dm and df together, who where chucked together because of decisions by the adults around them and actually having a fabulous time for it .

My proudest step mum moment was when a teacher asked the kids to introduce who they had bought with them ( it was a Mother's Day afternoon thing , school know I'm not her mummy ) , all the kids where saying "this is my mum/granny/auntie etc . It got to my dsd's turn and she simply said "this is my Norma "as if I needed no introduction and everyone should have one

It's tough some days most days and my dcs don't always make it easy for my dh either but we bimble along just doing our best and hoping everyone feels loved and equal .

I love my sdcs as fiercely as my own and due to our situation I am allowed with full backing from dh to parent any way I feel necessary, the good and not so good stuff that parenting is .

This topic is full of the shitty bits of being or having a step . Let have some nice stuff .

What's do you love about being step parent ?

I get to share half a handbag

@FanjoFizz

I was catching up with that earlier .. I'd love to know what goes on inside their minds sometimes

😂😂😂😂🙈

This is such a nice idea!

Lovely moments are few and far between in my day to day life, but over Easter I made dinner for everyone and when my partner’s younger son did his usual ‘I hate it’ routine, the older one - who I’m usually quite nervous of as he can be really horrible - defended me, said it was the best thing he’d eaten in months (he’s away at uni) and that the younger one was lucky to have food like this made for him all the time.

It’s a really small thing and it was about two months ago but I’m still really pleased by it!

I find 90% of being a step parent is indescribably awful but I try & enjoy the remaining 10%

We have dss (10) 50/50, Ive been poorly recently with a heart problem & he made me a card unprompted & was very attentive & concerned.

Yesterday we had a day at the seaside Myself, DH, my adult dc & dss and everyone enjoyed playing on the beach, fish & chips and the arcades.

For mother’s day dss sends me a card (prompted by DH) but this year he made me one & dh had bought him one as well so dss sent them both & wrote that I deserved 2 cards as I’m the best step mum in the world

What a nice post. Not SM related...but this below brings back memories resonates for me.

trying really hard not to be too loud or alert us to the fact they are actually trying to get to midnight so they can have a midnight feast

I so remember doing this as a kid. Great memories...where the food tastes that much better when you sneak it in your bedroom.

It’s not all rosy but when my DSD was younger I loved taking her on days out and to new places that her mum never took her to; she just loved it all. Now she’s older I like going shopping with her and having kitchen music parties while I’m cooking.

This is a nice idea I love seeing my DSD and DD getting on nicely. When DSD was staying over I walked in their bedroom to see them both cuddled up together in one bed watching videos and quietly chatting. Also love it when they call each other sister. They don't have to at all but they do anyway

I have a really close relationship with step children as we have them 100% of the time.
It's my birthday today and I had a really lovely message in my card from my dsd it said:
Herondale
Thank you so much for supporting me and always being there for me. You're always so loving and caring and I'm glad you married Dad. Your an amazing stepmom. Happy birthday. Love DSD

Moments like these reduce me to actual tears of happiness

DSD is lovely with my DS.

Well I've just been told that I'm loved 3rd the most .

"Mummy is first but she lives In heaven , daddy is 2nd because he letted me have ice cream , you are 3rd because you tidied my bedroom and I didn't want too"

I'll take 3rd

@HerondaleDucks
I think having them 100% of the time really is what makes the difference.

My dh is fully supportive of my parenting style and allows me to just get on with it and In turn the sdcs just take it for what it is .

I'm also lucky that the ex that my ss lives with has no issues with me or dh and whilst doesn't particularly communicate with us , doesn't make it difficult either .

My exh on the other hand has done his best on occasions to stir the pot but even that has settled down (for now at least !) I'm too bloody busy to give him and his games too much attention

I've got 2 step-kids. They were five and seven when their mum and I got together. I have so many lovely bits because they are both amazing but there is one memory I treasure more than most. I was saying goodnight to my stepdaughter one evening when she asked me if she should call me dad. I was caught a bit off-guard but i sat down and explained to her that I loved her and would always care for her as if she was my own daughter but she had a dad, he loved her very much and I wasn't here to replace him. The matter was never discussed again and I just assumed I'd handled it. However, on the first father's day after she turned 16 she gave me a card. Nothing unusual about that in itself but this one said "dad" on it, when none had previously, and inside she'd written "to the best dad.....". She gave me a big hug and said "I'm 16 now, I'm old enough to decide for myself what to call you". She's now a grown woman with two children of her own. She's called me dad ever since and they call me grandpa - I had no say in that, not that I'm complaining.

I have teen DSCs - they have worked out that my geeky science and maths knowledge comes in useful.

I am the best SM according to them, because I have not failed a science test since you came on the scene!!! I have spent many hours dong homework and teaching them the easy way to remember science - so far one A* science GCSE and am hoping for the same this year!!

this comes from kids whose mother says schooling is a waste of time and the 2 girls can marry well !! 4A* 4 As and a B last year - and a big thank you - I could not have done it without you - meant a huge amount.

this is coming