Maintaining contact through conflict

[Ferro5by5]

Hi all, I hope some of you could help advise me of what’s best here.

My husbands ex blocked him from contacting her some months ago. As a result contact with the children has broken down and various agencies have been working to help resolve the situation.

The kids have been in contact in the meantime with my husband. I have sent them a message once a week to send my love and wish them a good week ahead. No questions, lighthearted, no obligation to reply. My stepson has only replied once, but my stepdaughter has consistently sent really positive replies. Until today, when it appears she’s blocked me out of the blue.

I’m not angry or anything like that or looking for a solution. Just a really simple one - should I continue to send them both messages or leave it for a bit now? I want them to know I love them, that they’re still just as much my family as my blood relatives. But I also don’t want to cause them hurt or make them feel uncomfortable. Is it enough that they just talk to their dad for now? Any advice from someone who may have been in this situation on any side would be much appreciated. Thanks.

Oh, OP - this must be so tough for you all. Sending hugs.

If she's blocked you, maybe best to respect that for now and stop contact.

BUT, I'd ask your DH to make sure he tells them every time he speaks to them that you're sending your love, and that if they ever want to get in touch with you, you're ready and happy to hear from them.

Respect their process, but keep the door firmly and clearly open.

Are u sure she blocked u? Could the ex have done it instead?

It’s possible the ex did it, but I would be assuming there. It was very unexpected as we’d exchanged warm messages the night before and I’ve never known her to block anyone. I would’ve more expected her to reply more infrequently if she was upset for some reason.

I will ask my husband to pop a line sending my love on his messages to them from now on.