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Step-parenting

Connect with other Mumsnetters here for step-parenting advice and support.

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Original poster

Schools

41 replies

Spanglyprincess1 · 11/08/2018 19:52

Were buying a house in a much better school catchment and have kids 50:50 but their mother not my partner is the rp. She has asked to register them as living with us to get them into the better school.
Is this okay to do or is it fraud? Does switching residency to us change who get child benefit and CMS ? I assume as times goes on they will be at our not before and after high school as she is six miles away but we are 0.5.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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RoboJesus · 11/08/2018 19:57

If they live at your house they can register there. It's completely separate from the rest. That just depends on the amount of time they spend at each house

Original poster

Spanglyprincess1 · 11/08/2018 19:59

That's what confuses me as we have them 12-18 overnights a month. So I'm not sure at what point it switches?

OP posts:

ArnoldBee · 11/08/2018 20:01

You need to read the admissions policy of the school as some may consider it fraud.

Original poster

Spanglyprincess1 · 11/08/2018 20:03

Would it be local authority or the school itself? Also if we ahve them 50:50 where is the line drawn for residency- IE who is rp and the nrp

OP posts:

Applesandpears23 · 11/08/2018 20:05

Our council use who gets the child benefit as a proxy for who does the child really live with.

Original poster

Spanglyprincess1 · 11/08/2018 20:07

Okay great thanks, I'll check with the council.

OP posts:

RustyBear · 11/08/2018 20:18

Check the admissions policy of the school or local authority where you want a place, as definitions of main residence may differ.
For example, in the borough where I live, the main residence is “where the child lives for the majority of the school week. This is based on the number of school nights a child spends at the home (Sunday night 1800hrs to Friday 0900hrs). Where there is an equal split or there is any doubt about residence, the School Admissions Team will assess and make a judgment about which address to use for the purpose of the allocation of a school place where necessary requesting further information“. This may include addresses given to a pre-school or GP and information about how long the arrangement has been in force as well as ‘any legal documentation concerning residence’ - which I would guess might include the address of the person receiving child benefit

Original poster

Spanglyprincess1 · 11/08/2018 20:26

OP posts:

funinthesun18 · 11/08/2018 20:50

She can’t have it both ways.

greenlanes · 11/08/2018 20:56

Fun: Give the poor mum a break.

Clearly she would like her children to go to a certain school. If 50:50 (precisely) why not? There must be some advantages to 50:50 (normally very few). I do wonder what dad's view is?

funinthesun18 · 11/08/2018 21:04

Nah it just makes me when the rp doesn’t want to lose the perks (eg child benefit and cms) but also wants to use their ex’s address to get the child in to a better school. Like I said, can’t have it both ways.

Just as bad if it’s 50/50.

Original poster

Spanglyprincess1 · 11/08/2018 23:53

Funinthesun18 - tbh I agree with you. I don't mind at all if the kids get a better education but it was her choice to buy where she did and move. If it comes to it then switching residences eg who gets child benefit might be only way to show residency depending on council then we will see what she wants to do.
I was mostly worried about the fraud angle as I don't want to get in trouble or for it to.impact my babies ability to get into the school once he is older, schools are on of reason we are buying in area we are.

OP posts:

funinthesun18 · 12/08/2018 01:52

I was mostly worried about the fraud angle as I don't want to get in trouble or for it to.impact my babies ability to get into the school once he is older, schools are on of reason we are buying in area we are.

I can understand that. Like a pp said speak to the council and explain the situation so that you go in to it all knowing the full facts can go from there. The ex may need to change the rp/nrp status of her and your dh and I can’t imagine many in her position willing to do that so easily.
In my area the children are registered at the address with the parent who receives CB regardless of how much contact the child has with their other parent. So school applications have to be done using that address. It would be fraud for my dsc’s mum to use our address and I wouldn’t like the council to see us as being part of that so I understand your concerns. Speak to the council on Monday though as it might be different rules where you are.

swingofthings · 12/08/2018 10:16

Typical attitude fun. What mum's wants to do is not to benefit her, it's to benefit her child, ie. the child they share but of you course, you have to see it as her getting something from it.

Bezm · 12/08/2018 10:22

There has to be the person in receipt of child benefit living at the address. The council will check this. You won't be done for fraud but if the mother is the person with RP then she could depending on how harsh the LA want to be.
So, to do this legally (and morally) change over the child benefit, change over residency, change over who gets what in maintenance then put the child's name down. However, there is no guarantee they will covet a place at that school, especially if it is over subscribed, so you could do all that and still not get them into the school.
Do NOT expect the child to lie about where they live, this will be ongoing throughout their school life!

Bezm · 12/08/2018 10:24

Swing, of course what mum wants to do is for the benefit of the child. However, she must do it correctly!

funinthesun18 · 12/08/2018 10:28

I get it’s to benefit her child I’ve never disputed that. My point is that in order to do so she will probably have to swap who is classed as the rp and the nrp, but most likely won’t be willing to do so. Would you be?
Hence my comment that she can’t have it both ways.

swingofthings · 12/08/2018 11:53

Maybe she will need to swap, maybe she won't. I believe that only the schools that are contentious would bother to check and even then, they might consider other means of accepting residency.

You have no idea whatsover whether she would be willing to swap CB or not if she had to. You don't know what they agreement is between dad or not. Would I have agreed to give up CB in this instance, yes, I certainly would have.

There is enough angst on this thread about exes making assumptions on SM and SM who can't every do right or wrong, it doesn't help when SM make derogatory statements based on complete assumptions about the ex themselves.

All it shows is your bitterness that a mum could potentially benefit from something the dad does for his child, the same way some exes would rather no agree to something that would benefit their child if they believes their dad could gain anything favourable for himself as a result.

funinthesun18 · 12/08/2018 12:40

It’s not about being bitter. Blunt yes. It is a fact that you can’t use someone else’s address to get your child in to a preferred school. If they are registered with one parent they can’t be registered over to the other just to get hem in to a better school. Their main address is with with parent who claims CB. I don’t know how else I can put it without you getting up in arms about it.

And I’m making the assumption because it’s a big thing to be the rp and then become the nrp. Some (or a lot of) parents wouldn’t want to sacrifice being classed as the main carer as well as give up the CB/tax credits if asked to. The school place would soon be forgotten about if told to do this by the LA.

swingofthings · 12/08/2018 12:58

It is a fact that you can’t use someone else’s address to get your child in to a preferred school.
That is not what your post was about though. You made it clear that it was about her getting perks, ie. the child registered at one address for the purpose of gaining access to the better school whilst at the same time still receiving CB.

The child IS living at her dad's address. They are living at both, but until now was registered at her mum. Now she will be registered at her dad's. Receiving CB or not doesn't change that.

In any case, what happens to people who earn too much to claim CB? Shouldn't they go to their local school because their parents don't claim it?

lunar1 · 12/08/2018 13:02

Irrespective of who is the RP, the child has two addresses. There should be one advantage to that. Why shouldn't the child not benefit without it causing unnecessary angst and drama.

Just put the name down from her dads address. I've never been asked to show CB for dc's schooling. Which is a good job as I don't get any!

littlebigtown · 12/08/2018 13:27

I'm In the same position , we share the kids straight 50/50 . We will using his address to apply for high school as it's a much better school than the ones close to my address .

We have 2 dds , he claims child benefit for one I claim for the other so maybe thats what's makes the difference , there hasn't been many advantages to our arrangement but I'd say that this is one .

The dds do live there , well as much as they live at mine so I don't feel morally we are doing anything wrong , it's probably the only thing we ever agreed on and it's is in the best interest of the kids .

I'd have a chat with admissions and run it passed them , 50/50 is much more common now so it won't have been the first time they have had to deal with it .

WhiteCat1704 · 12/08/2018 13:32

any case, what happens to people who earn too much to claim CB? Shouldn't they go to their local school because their parents don't claim it?

We had that..DH still had to register for child benefit even though he wasn't claiming the money to be classed as the resident parent. This is the main one for the CSA. If OPs DH becomes the resident parent he will be able to claim maintanace as well as benefits.

funinthesun18 · 12/08/2018 13:42

That is not what your post was about though. You made it clear that it was about her getting perks, ie. the child registered at one address for the purpose of gaining access to the better school whilst at the same time still receiving CB.

Well yes it did make me go . It does seem a bit take take take.

But anyway, the most important point is that, if anything it could be taking a place away from a child who might need it more. That’s why I don’t think think the rules should be bent like that. It should be made official so people can’t just make “decide” they want to use a different address whenever they like. I’d love to use my parents’ address to get my children in to the lovely school nearby to them, but if I wanted to do that I would need to hand over the main carer responsibilities to them (and the perks too). Or move in with them, which definitely won’t be happening!

The child IS living at her dad's address

Yes I know, but by law only one parent is classed as the main carer. The LA or the school doesn’t care if the child sees their dad regularly. The have to draw the line somewhere about the child’s registered address.

In any case, what happens to people who earn too much to claim CB? Shouldn't they go to their local school because their parents don't claim it?

There will still be an underlying entitlement should their circumstances ever change. There will always be an rp and an nrp, which is evident through who gets maintenance and who sees the child more.

TwistedStitch · 12/08/2018 14:15

It does seem a bit take take take

Only if you think a child getting into a better school is something purely for the mother's benefit. Maybe the Dad also has a stake in his kids education and agrees it's a good thing?

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