Hi. I've changed my name for this as I think dh knows my other name and I don't want him reading this.
My dsd is 14 and after an argument with her mum came to stay with us for the week. The problem is that she's been lying, staying out late, being rude etc etc.
On Saturday dh laid out the ground rules, home from school by 5, help with washing up, bed by 10 etc.
On Monday she came home late, didn't want her dinner then asked for something to eat at 9.30 at night. Dh trotted off the kitchen and made her a ready meal, then let her stay up and watch a film.
She missed her bus yesterday and got to school late, got home late again last night.
Dh had a bit of a go at her then said she can go out till 7 tonight and gave her £10.
Then, he moved her school bag out of the way, and 20 cigarettes fell out, so he went mad, took back the £10 and told her she wasn't allowed out and to come straight home from school for the rest of the week.
This morning he told me he'd given her back the £10 and told her she could stay out tonight after all.
He's so bloody soft with her, no wonder she's running wild. He wants her to live with us (my worst nightmare!) so he thinks if he's nice to her she'll want to live here.
I told him last night she needs boundaries and he's too soft. He said "all parents give in sometimes and I don't get to see her for a whole week very often" which I understand, but it seems to me he is rewarding her for behaving badly and she'll just get worse and worse if someone doesn't rein her in a bit.
Sorry this is a rant, but I'm so frustrated as I can't talk to anyone else about this without seeming like a complete cow. I do love my dsd, she's a lovely girl most of the time but this week she's been a monster.