Step daughter nightmare

[Kaypops]

Hey I’m really needed some advice I’ve lived with my partner for a year she has 3 children one he grown up and the other 2 lived with us I have an amazing relationship with my step son who is 10 but my step daughter is a complete nightmare her behaviour was so bad and extreme that my partner self referred her to social care and she is in a residential care home .. she stole from me she was violent and aggressive and ended up assaulting me as well and I am really struggling to move on from things has anyone been in a similar situation and does anyone have any advice for me please? Anything would be really appreciated

Stop thinking its about you in anyway? That poor child.

Is she mentally unstable/ill? Sounds very tough OP but if she has issues of that magnitude and is dangerous to be around it's best she is not living with you. Has she always been violent? How old is she? I'm guessing a teenager??

Stop thinking its about you in anyway? That poor child.
^...^
How is this helpful?

Has she been referred to a counsellor? I was wondering if do anything together as a family.

Sometimes when children act out...It's due to insecurities or fears that they are getting pushed out in their parents life.

Does she have her dad in her life?

Does she get on with her mum?

It's very helpful. OP seems only to care about their own feelings.

It’s all chosen behaviour as said my a professional she’s 15 and it’s not just thinking about my own feelings due to her behaviour my partner is on the brink of losing her career I had to leave my employment due to all the stress and my step son has suffered emotionally because of her so no I’m not just thinking of my own feelings I came here to seek advice if anyone had been in a similar situation

Not got any experienxe but must be really tough.
Has your dss got access to counselling? Is there a plan in place for her to work towards coming home?

She is on a waiting list for counselling etc as sc delayed it putting services in place and no plan for returning home has she is too much of a risk especially to her younger brother

Poor kid.

In the meantime, find the ‘full stop’ key as your writing is near-impossible to understand.

I have suffered similar abuse over a period of 30 years. My step-daughter is now 39 and still the tantrums go on. There are two ways of looking at this . Things are good between us when she falls out with her mother. Things get really bad when her mother is back in the frame . Her mother hates me and her daughter suffers from divided loyalties which manifest as disrespectful behaviour to me. So you can say "poor girl" But the other side is she uses the occasion to manipulate her father. In my opinion the issues are between your step daughters parents. You like me just become the scapegoat for sometimes all three of them.