School bus

[tiredpom]

DH is away with work as it happens so is his ex. I have been asked to take DSS to school, no worries - but it's at least an hour round trip. Then I need to get into my work, an hour away in the opposite direction. So I looked at other options, as it happens there is a school bus in our area that could take him. Only for kids that go to his school, I mentioned it casually to DH. His response was, you can't be serious he's never got on a bus in his life. (Not true) I jokingly said don't worry they won't expect him to drive it ! Is it wrong to suggest this ? Interestingly enough, I don't think DSS is very independent could do more for himself and wonder if DH is hampering this area of development. For example, DH will make DS breakfast - pour his cereal, get his cutlery etc. whereas I ask does he want for breakfast - tell him what we have then get him to help himself, tidy up after. What's normal for a 10 year old or do I expect to much?

Sounds perfectly fine to me. Maybe DH pampers him a bit too much but that's his choice however if you've been asked to get him to school then that's your choice and school buses are a perfectly safe and acceptable way to do so

Firstly it’s not fair that both his parents have not discussed with each other when they are away with work... how would it have worked if your DP was single?
Secondly did you agree to do the school runs or was it just assumed you would?
Thirdly a 10 year old (I’m assuming year 6?) is more than capable of getting on a school bus - especially if you compromise and wait for him to get on the bus?
Will taking him make you late for work then? Is there anyone else who can take him? Are you being left to take care of him on your own whilst his parents go off with work?
None of this seems right to me

I can drive him to the bus stop and I would wait with him. DH was already booked to be away when it was requested that he came to us. I'll be over an hour late into the office ....

(I was asked but it was after everyone had booked their travel - lol)

That’s not fair OP! His parents are taking advantage. How long are they away for?

An hour round trip in the opposite direction? A one off, fine. Regularly- no.

Say that you can’t do it and his own parents will have to sort it out. Cheeky things.

Basically they are putting their own careers first and yours will be suffering and you’re not even the parent! I’m assuming you’ll have to leave early to collect DSC from school too?

10 is a great age to start taking the bus from time to time - its actually a positive for your DSS to learn these life skills.

If your DP has concerns then he should take him on a trial run so he knows where to pay and when to get off the bus.

If it’s a school bus will he not need a permit

Otherwise yes I would let him get the bus at 10 provided I saw him safely on and it dropped at the school

I was taking the bus to school by the age of 8 both ways. It wasnt even a bus just for our school but 3 different schools the other two being high schools. Was about a 40 minute trip. No problem at all.

My DH is like yours though would never dream of expecting DSD to catch a bus to school even when she is in her last years there.

EVERYTHING Winosaurus says!
I cannot believe his parents would make travel plans without checking with each other & then you if it’s ok.
I’d be particularly annoyed with his dm as it sounds like it’s on her access days!
Obviously what’s done is done now & the poor kid has to be gotten to school (& bus perfectly reasonable at 10 btw) but I would be letting dp & his ex BOTH know that you will not be doing this again unless asked BEFORE they make their own plans.

If it’s a dedicated school bus (as in doesn’t have members of the public on it) then I don’t see the issue.
I’ve recently said to my OH that I think he babies his 10 year old too much and I think he’s almost just not realised that she’s grown up and can do some things herself

If its a school bus going to his school and no where else and you will watch him onto it fine.
You could probably sell it to the kid as an adventure and chance to meet new people.
A public bus for an hour at 10, or trusting a 10 year old to leave the house by themselves - no.

I don't see an issue with that if it's only going to that school.

Surely he'd know people using that bus anyway.