We have my partner's DSD and DSS every other weekend. We have been together 3 years but I was only able to meet them a year ago. Simply put their mum despises me - but it's a long story to go into. Partner and I now have an 8 week old DD together.
DSS is 8 and refuses to eat any vegetables, he is also a very fussy eater! A few months ago, partner, DSS and I agreed to try something we has seen on tv and during a Sunday dinner cooked about 9 different vegetables for him to try with the plan of him selecting a few that he liked so he could have a little of them in the future. On the day in question he caused quite a fuss. We talked rationally but explained that if he wouldn't even try, then he wouldn't get dessert. He doesn't ever eat much of his food, but always wants dessert - and I know that's just part of being a kid. He made up his mind that he already didn't like any of them and that of course they were poison. Upshot being he got no dessert. Partner drove the kids home and took some mini doughnuts with him for himself. It crossed my mind that he might give DSS some, but I hoped not.
Today DSS very smugly revealed that he had been given a doughnut and therefore got dessert that day. He also said that I had stopped him having dessert on multiple occasions. This isn't true, as it was only the once but he insisted that I, not We, had done this. There have been other comments over the past few weeks too.
AIBU that I feel betrayed and disrespected by my partner. Before we got together I had major trust issues and now I feel really let down by him. We had agreed how to parent his children in our house but now I feel undermined. DSS questions most things I ask him to do, such as not using his iPod whilst having dinner. This just felt like a smug secret they had that was dropped on me. I'm worried I'm blowing it out of proportion but it's a big deal to me. Especially when their mummy has made me out to be the wicked witch and said mean things to them about our DD's name.