My Christmas present to 'd'h is telling him our marriage is pretty much over.

[LazySusan11]

I have a thread from previous..it's Christmas Day, I'm sat in my dressing gown it's not yet 9am having been up since 5.30 like lots of people getting stuff ready I was having a sit down and a cup of tea. Dsd announces that her mum would be arriving shortly. I said I wasn't aware nor was I ready, dsd did her usual attitude and spoke to me like shit and dh explained that dsd dm asked if she could bring over dsd presents and they'd open them all together (1 big happy family)

Dsd has been here 4 days she's due to go back to her mums at 2pm so why it couldn't wait I don't know. Dh doesn't get my point, says I don't have to rush around getting showered I can stay in my pjs

The point is this is my home I wasn't asked or consulted it was done without my knowledge. Dsd dm is over purely to give dsd gifts because she can't wait a few hours.

This is the cherry on the cake, I'm done. I'm having a shit time anyway as this is my first Christmas without Mum and I feel a bit wobbly. I don't need this and I don't want to be in a marriage where my feelings are never taken into consideration.

My marriage is over, merry Christmas arsehole.

Sounds out of order. How old is DSD? Not that it matters really...when did their marriage end?

Well, damn. That sounds shit, but I can't say I blame you.

Wtf is wrong with him?! They would be a deal breaker for me too. So sorry. I can't believe he has done this to you.

After everything from your last post, you're defo better off out

Thinking of you x

My word that is pretty inconsiderate isn’t it! Certainly not unreasonable to feel that way but pause and talk before you make any decisions. Decisions made whilst feelings are high are not always the best. Hope Christmas gets better from here on in for you

You're quite right. I'd bin it all too. Fuck em. Step parenting is a thankless ordeal sometimes.

Is your marriage really over or are you just venting? Either is fine but one means you're probably significantly more hurt than angry.

I'd be raging in your shoes. If your marriage is actually over can you take yourself off upstairs with some wine/choc/books and stay out if their way for the rest of the day?

If your just venting I'd probably get myself changed open champagne and park myself in the best seat by the tree and let them get in with it

This sort of thing has been happening for 10 years now. I will never have my feelings taken into account. I'm disappearing off for the day.

I remember the other thread @LazySusan11 - so sorry you're feeling this bad x

It's all about them, never about you. Yeah suck it up buttercup! Nope, not anymore OP. I'd say come round to me home alone but I'm bloody ill! 💐

This is not even about step-parenting, how could he have not felt the need to let you know she would be coming? I'd be very annoyed if DH had invited any family member in the morning without telling me, so inviting your ex without even bothering to mention it to you -let alone asking you if this is ok- is just... well... unbelievable!

It's not even like the child is a kid. I'm so sorry for you and good on you walking out for the day.

Have a lovely walk OP. Do you have the chance to visit other family over the next few days?

It's nit normal, they are walking all over you. I'd be throwing my toys out big style by walking ....

Hi Susan
I completely understand how this feels like the last straw. Their behaviour just gets more and more exclusive and you’re made to feel bad if you question it - you deserve better.

Hope you’re OK.

I too remember your other thread. I am so sorry it has come to this :( It's hard being expected to just suck it up all the time and if your DH hasn't got your corner you are probably better off. I'm so, so sorry and I hope you're OK

Your husband is n’t allowed to invite anyone over ? It’s his house too

what has happened since, op?

Oh Susan , they are cutting you out.
Time to put yourself first. Your DH is obviously not on your side.
Big hugs to you.

@LazySusan11 I remember your other thread too. Really just leave. You sound like a great woman who is just been ridden over roughshod.
New Year, new start.
Go for it.
Really go for it as it doesn't sound like your dh is ever going to change/see things from your POV.

Could anyone possibly link to other thread please?

That's so disrespectful! He needs to up his communication game, what a dick move.

He needs to understand he is never to spring anything like this on you again.

@AintNoOtherFan - look for 'I'm annoyed, really annoyed'

Will do thank you

I think I win without doubt the most rubbish SP ever.

does anyone else feel jealous of the time DH spends with the grown up kids ? or I am just mad :(