Been with my DP for 2 years, no DCs together but we have 2 each from previous relationships of similar ages.
We don’t live together yet (maybe in the future) but we live very close and his DCs come and go from my house as they please, always made to feel welcome and often pop in for drinks, snacks, to use the loo at mine etc. Eldest’s best friends live on my road so she’s always popping in and out.
Anyway the reason I’m posting is because I’m finding the eldest increasingly difficult to deal with. She’s almost 13 and I’m aware teenage hormones are kicking in and behaviour gets harder as she’s testing her boundaries etc but she seems to be allowed to speak and act however she wants. She can be so rude at times and very demanding and if she doesn’t get her own way she’ll physically lash out at her dad! She acts almost “alpha male” in her behaviour and can be so aggressive.
So herein lies the issue... recently she popped into mine to charge her phone and help herself to whatever snacks were in the cupboard, she has 2 friends in tow and she started shouting because we weren’t going to an event that night that lots of our friends and their kids were going to. I explained it’s because the tickets for us all would have totalled £180 for all of us and we just didn’t have it spare at the time the tickets were booked. She then got aggressive and started shouting about how I earn loads of money (I don’t by the way, I have a nice house but it was bought with inheritance money) and how I was selfish. All of this in front of these 2 girls I’ve allowed into my home and don’t know.
I asked her calmly to leave and after her friends walked out I pulled her to one side and basically said it was unacceptable to speak to me like that and I won’t tolerate it. She then proceeded to tell me to fuck off.
My DP called me from work about 5 minutes later saying she’d called him and told him I threw her out of the house, I explained what happened but he said I was in the wrong for pulling her up on it and I should have left it to him???
I told him in no uncertain terms that I am not putting up with it and he needs to talk to her.
He apologised for her behaviour but she hasn’t yet. That was 3 days ago.
Today I know she is with her friends close by and I really don’t feel like being accommodating to her. If the door is knocked I’m not going to answer it, no one will be home.
Am I in the wrong for putting my foot down about this? She’s allowed to behave so entitled and rude all the time but I don’t see why I should just have to put up with it